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Broken

He was a celebrity now. A famous actor. He went around, acting so confident and carefree, putting up a facade. And everyone believed it. They thought he was just a big kid who put out a bad boy image but really didn't have a care in the world.
They were wrong.

Cause I've been high, I've been low. I've spent a thousand nights alone, tryin to hold on tight.

He enjoyed acting. He really did. But sometimes, his job was just too much. There was so much constant pressure, even on his so called breaks. It wasn't his managers fault. It wasn't anyone's fault. It was just like that. There were also the haters. Even though he had millions of fans, the hate comments always got to him, making him doubt himself.

Do I deserve a shred of worth or am I just another fake f*cked up lost cause?

But the worst part of all were the rules. The rules caged him into being a perfect idol. The rules limited his feelings and emotions, smashing them down until he supposedly had none. But he wasn't perfect, and he certainly did have feelings. He wished with his whole life that he could say that he only had feelings, that all of it was in the past now, but he couldn't.

Cause feelings come but they won't go.

He still remembered her. He still loved her. But no one knew. He had built up a shell around himself and kept it all inside. He only put the things he wanted people to see, the good qualities, on the outside; his carefreeness, his confidence, and his fake happiness. He hid all the ugly, bad things on the inside. The pain, the sadness, the depression, but the thing that was buried the deepest was his feelings and memories of her.
He had been going on like this, hiding his true self for 3 years now. They had both moved on to new dramas, new jobs. But he could tell, his wall, his defenses, were starting to crumble. Sooner or later, they would break completely.
It was just a matter of time.

Please won't someone take me home before I lose my mind.

A/N - This story was inspired by the song attached (Broken), specifically the line "Cause I've been high, I've been low. I've spent a thousand nights alone, tryin to hold on tight."
As always, thanks for reading.