The Kings Adeline

9: the saddness

"Sit straight!"

"Do not slouch!"

"Chin up!"

"Are you not listening to me!?" I jump at her voice and her stick once again cracks down on my hand. I look down at my hands and frown. My knuckles were bloody and bruised.

"I told you to listen. You are to be a queen not a small child." She spits. I look up at her. "I do not wish to be his queen." I whisper and her face fills with more rage than before. "You do not have a choice child!" She was about to crack down again until the door opens and sir James enters the room.

I remove my hands from the table so he is unable to see the torcher I'm being put through. "Sir James, how can I help you." The governess says with a smile. "I just wanted to check up on our young queen." I look up at him and give him a small smile.

"I'm just teaching her the basics, isn't that right Adeline." I shiver when my name lasts her lips. "Yes governess." I say quietly. Sir James nods. "Dinner will be served soon." The governess bows and sir James hesitantly leaves.

The governess tugs on the back of my dress, pulling me straight up and I feel her chapped lips against my ear. "You will learn to listen and be a submissive queen you weak human." She hisses and pushes me out the door. I don't hesitate to run down the hall and to my room.

When I do finally get to my room, I lock the door and fall to the floor. My body automatically curls into a ball and the tear flow down my cheeks. The sobs escape my lips and I couldn't help but to break down.

"Princess..." I hear a small whisper. I don't even to wipe my face and sit up, looking around the room. "Who's there?" I croak out and a small figure comes from what looks like a secret door.

I move closer to get a better look to see a small boy covered in dirt and mud. My mouth opens to talk but the boy puts his finger to is lips. I slowly nod and he brings out a letter from behind his back. He hands it to me and quickly slips out from where he came. I get up, "wait!" I cry out but there was no handle for me to get past the secret door.

I look back down at the letter too see a pine tree embroidered with wax. I go over the window seat and open the letter without a second thought. I could tell right away that is was my mother's handwriting.

My sweet Adeline,
    
     The northern kingdom is standing by a thread and I'm afraid for the future as I discovered that our trusted Maverick has betrayed us. The beast has sent him to be king until Zachary is old enough to take over, but I believe that to be untrue. They had captured the triplets and I when we were trying to escape through the passage way. Wolves are all over the kingdom watching every move. Your father is dead but they have not gave us the closure of burying him. Maverick has told me that we had to wait for the beast and you to come.
           This is just a dream.... but very clever people can hear dreams. So please just listen. I know your afraid, but being afraid is alright. Because didn't anyone ever tell you? Fear is a superpower. Fear can make you faster and cleverer and one day your gonna come back to this castle. And on that day your going to be very afraid. But that's okay....because if your very wise and very strong, fear doesn't have to make you cruel or cowardly. Fear can make you kind. You. Now you listen to me...your going to be furious and your gonna be sad. Don't let this change you. Whatever happens next, where he sends you in this cruel world. I know what you are capable of. You don't be a warrior. Don't let this turn you into a monster. I may not be here when you come but promise me Adeline. I'm not asking you to give me a promise I am ordering you as your mother and your queen. In the end, everyone does this alone...this is as brave as I know you can be.
                                                  With all my love,
                                                                 Queen Sarah

The ink starts to run as my tears soak the paper. I am a human in a castle full of wolves. I am the weakest one and I will be broken and beaten for the rest of my life. How could I just jump on the beast like that for my own pleasure.

I gag at the thought. Im completely disgusted with myself. Saying that my sobs could most likely be heard throughout the whole castle was an understatement.

————————

It's been over a week, the morning came early and it made me alert as the warm sun shinned down on my weak body. I didn't have the energy to move. How could I knowing the man I loved and trusted with my life betray me. He's as dirty and ruthless as the other wolves. 

Of course I didn't love him in a romantic way but as an older brother. He was there when I needed him when my family outcasted me. The words my mother wrote play in my head. I was stronger than anyone thought. I may look normal but I was far from it.

I will not let this castle turn me into a cruel monster. I will not coward away when fear runs through my body. I will be wise and kind because that is all I've ever known to be.

Knock

Bang

"Adeline are you alright." I hear Merriam at the door, jiggling the nob. I just turn away from the door and lay there lifeless. My tears had finally run dry and my body had no energy to even move a finger. I hadn't ate anything that was brought for me and I refused any audience's. The room was getting colder by the second and I loved the feeling. It was like I was back at home in the woods, playing in the snow.

I hum in satisfaction not even hearing my bedroom door being kicked in and falling on the ground. "Oh my." I hear Merriam gasp and loud foot steps coming closer to my body. "Adeline." My lips frown hearing the deep voice. It held no emotion and I want to look up at him and show him I had no fear but I couldn't move. I was frozen in place.

The cracking of ice fills my ears and the warmth of the beast spreads along my body. "My king the maids made a hot bath." I suddenly missed the cold and I tried to move but nothing.

"My king the bath is too hot." I could hear everything but I was unable to open my eyes. But my lips slightly open and a sigh passes. Fire engulfed me but no pain came to me.

"Adeline I need you to open your eyes." And just like that they opened and came face to face with the beast. "I want to go home." I close my eyes and turn my head away from him.

"You will be very soon my queen." I hear Merriam say. I open my eyes and look at her. "Not soon enough." She goes to speak again but I slid under the water and hold my breath. Drowning out the voices.

I will not give the people of this castle the satisfaction to see me hide and fray away. I wanted to just wither away as if I never existed, never born. Just like ash from an amber blowing away with the wind. This all just felt like a bad dream.

A dream I couldn't escape.