Avengers/Peter Parker oneshots :P

Irondad Out Of Control

Tony never realised how much kids liked him. 

Sure, he kept in touch with Harley throughout all those years, sending him birthday gifts and christmas presents, occasionally turning up randomly to say hi. 

And sure, Peter called him 'dad' and was obsessed with hugging him ever since he discovered that was okay, while Shuri called him her broken white boy number 2, having long science conversations with him whenever possible. 

And yes, Nebula played paper soccer with him and brought him unripe fruits constantly, spending time with Morgan whom absolutely adored him (or did she? She was pretty upset when he took away the sword Nebula gifted her). 

But until he awoke on his birthday to all of them hugging him and giving him cards that made him cry, Tony hadn't realised how much they liked him. 

He also hadn't realised how much he liked kids. 

"Tony?" Pepper asked as the pair sat in a cafe, having a coffee date on the way to a meeting with another company. Tony didn't reply, so she followed his gaze upon a small child colouring in with a crayon, their tongue sticking out. 

Her eyes narrowed. "Tony, no." 

Tony pouted. "Whyyyyyyyyyy??????" 

"We already have five, we don't need any more." 

"Are you sure? We can afford it, and look at their faces!" 

"Tony we are not having any more kids, end of story." 

He scowled into his coffee, still eyeing the child. 

Later on, Tony was sitting in Morgan's kindie class, having come to meet them as a special treat that afternoon. They were all currently sitting in front of them, staring endlessly at him, mouths hanging open. 

"-and that is how I became the most beautiful Ironman in the galaxy. Any questions?"

A couple of hands went up, so Tony answered questions such as if fairies were real, if he was secretly Tony Stark, and if it was true that there was a thing such as a bone fairy that stole your bones during the night ("the fairy bone mother") which was something one of the older kids had told them, apparently. 

Eventually, there was one last question. 

"Ironmaaaaaaaaaaaaaan??" The smallest of the children asked, a little girl who was missing her two front teeth and had a bandaid over her nose, her red hair pulled back into piggy tails. 

"Yep?" 

"Can you be my dad? Mine went to somewhere else and never came back." 

Tony's smile widened. "Ye-"

He was cut off by Pepper spraying him with a spray bottle of water. 

"Tony no! Bad Tony! Bad Tony!" 

Tony hissed at her like a cat and the children laughed. 

"Did she just say that I abandoned her again?" Said a voice by the door, and there stood a tall man with matching red hair to the little girl. "Abby I went to work and left you here, we've talked about this." 

Abby's eyes lit up as she scrambled off the floor and over to her father. "Daddy! You came back for me!" Her face went stonily serious. "Now take me home, please. Please please please please please please-" 

"I take it you're taking her home early today?" The teacher interrupted, walking over with the sign out book. 

"Yeah, doctors appointment."