Homin Pride drabbles

#20

3rd Person's P.O.V: 

Living life is hard when you got the devil on your back and the expectations of others hanging around your neck like a noose, it is uncomfortable and tiresome but he just wants to jump and forget this nightmare of a world. 

The unbearable pain of yesterday breathing down his neck and he just can't live like this anymore, it is starting to become a nuisance to others comfort, it makes him feel guilty and wrong. 

He just wants someone to hold him and tell him everything will be okay...

He just wants to be able to say he lives without regret, yet everything is starting to feel like the bitter taste of hate and remorse. The emotional cocktail is starting to become more intoxicating and even more scary, it is no longer about forgetting, it has become something more than just a way to numb the effects of the real world. 

Too many people already made their disdain for Yunho's way of living known, it has been like this for a long time, Yunho has developed thick skin but his heart still can feel the impact but he doesn't care. 

The only person still not giving up on him is Changmin. 

He has been on his side from the beginning and he has not run, it makes him thankful but the feeling of letting him down is too much to bare. 

"I'm not going anywhere hyung, it is you and me now! We don't need them... any of them, it is just us." Changmin felt rage and anger from the betrayal and hurt. 

Yunho, he felt nothing. 

He held his hyung until his breathe evens out and he wasn't shaking and shivering from the night terrors that seem to be a plague to his sanity. 

Everyone else abandon Yunho after his return. They gave to many excuses as to why they couldn't stay, it was overdue, yet they were generous enough to leave a voicemail of farewells and good luck. 

No sense of loyalty or love, it angered the younger man to no end, it was the fact they couldn't stand by him and be there! It was the fact that they turned their backs on him! They said no, it is all on you and they went radio silent, it was a slap to the face! A blow to the heart, it was the fact that Yunho would do anything for those cowards but they couldn't offer the same hand that picked them up. 

He is angry for Yunho. 

Changmin is the only one here! 

He is present and that is enough.

He will be here til the end and when Yunho is ready to get back up again and that will be worth it. Seeing the older man smile again, it will be worth it and he will be there and take his hand and help him. 

Right now it is hard, coming back from war, it is a scary thing. Yunho experienced a lot in his service time. Changmin could never imagine doing, it is unimaginable and brave... but when the older man came home. He wasn't the same, he saw his friends and team die and he survived, it broke his spirit and soul! His reminder is his injuries and scars, he dislocated his left shoulder and his left knee shattered, it is painful still even after recovery and a gunshot wound to his side, luckily not piercing anything major. 

But he came home broken physically, emotionally, and mentally and everyone left him, even his partner, Changmin stayed out of love and respect for the older man. He owes him everything, this man saved him from almost killing himself and he is determined to do the same. 

He does not feel the whispers of sleep calling him as he still holding the other man in his arms, trying to be a blanket of protection and warmth. He is holding him the way Yuhno held him all those years ago, it is all the years of trust, love, loyalty, respect, and friendship and the fact nobody stayed but him... it broke his heart for Yunho.

Changmin will stay by his side until Yunho can stand up on his own and even then... he will be by his side cuz that is what you do for the people you love. 

-The End