The Golden Maknae

The Next Three Days

I went to see the shrink that afternoon, she was really nice and basically, we just talked about my life with Bo.  She said to come back the next day so I did, and we talked about the rest, up to the present. 

She asked me a lot of questions that were vague but also aimed at having me realize my own inner strength. When I recognized what she was doing I got better and quicker at answering. The last thing she said on that second day was that she had never seen anyone work through the trauma the way I did. She said I could come back but she thought that I had control and I probably wouldn't have any more panic attacks. 

She offered anti-depressants but I declined. I wasn't clinically depressed, I just had a traumatic experience.  I just needed a minute, to process. 

I had a lot of fun each night hanging with the guys, watching movies and talking all night, but it was time to let them go to their own bedrooms. They were leaving the next day for Japan and I didn't know for how long. I was trying to decide where I was going to sleep that last night when Jungkook came to me and asked if I was going to sleep with him. 

He blushed and said, "You know, like in my arms." 

"Yes, I will."

I passed out almost immediately in the shelter of his arms. I woke up in the middle of the night to his kisses. I kissed him back and ran my fingers through his hair. We looked into each other's eyes. 

"You saved my life, Jungkook. I can never repay you." 

"You never have to repay me." he said. 

"I can try." I climbed on top of him and pulled off my nightgown, aka his shirt. 

"You are perfect." he whispered. I helped him take off his shirt and then went for his shorts. 

"Should we do this, I mean, are you ready?"

"Yes, Kookie. I'm Ok." 

"I just don't want to hurt you."

I climbed off of him and put the shirt back on, then left the room.  I could hear him getting out of bed, so I ran to the first room I saw open and hid in there until he went past. If he didn't want me why did he ask me to go to bed with him? Was I damaged goods?

I went back to his room and got dressed, then carefully made my way to the front door with my bag and left. He was leaving the next day anyway. Might as well start trying to figure out my life now. 

There was a hotel down the street so I walked there and rented a room for the night. The next day I would start finding a place and get a bank account, figure out what I needed to do to get on my feet. I needed to stand on my own two feet. 

I laid down on the musty bed and went to sleep.

When I woke I remembered the night before and cried for a few minutes, then got in the shower and got ready to face my life. 

I went down to the desk and asked to use the guest computer, and looked up banks. I picked out the closest one and started walking. 

"Rose! Rose! Stop!" I heard someone yelling and the heavy footfalls of someone running really fast. I turned around and saw Taehyung. He was in his pajamas and looked exhausted. 

"We have been looking for you all night." he had his hands on his knees, breathing hard.  

"Why? I thought you guys were leaving for Japan today." he pulled out his phone and started making a phone call.

"Yeah,  but you were supposed to come with us... hey Jungkook, I found her."

"What do you mean I'm coming with you? No one said anything about me going?"