The Love Affair

Chapter Thirty-Four

Had I really admitted it? The truth right there.

Nick froze. It was like the entire world had frozen for that crucial second. Now, all it needed was fire to start burning through the corridor to take us down and leave nothing but crumbling debris.

I was holding my breath. Counting to 10 in my head. Each second Nick took longer to respond, the longer I dreaded the anticipation.

"You...you, what?" he finally muttered, barely audible. Sweat glistened on his forehead threatening to snake down across his face. It had suddenly got hotter in here. Somehow felt like my own personal hell or maybe it had come to the surface to snatch me for my incredible bad actions.

"I...cheated," I replied, cutting out the hesitancy as I knew it just wasn't possible to cover up the lies anymore.

Nick went weak on his knees, stumbling about as he failed to keep on his own two feet. The colour from his face drained away leaving a pale, ghostly tint in its place. I'm pretty sure I heard him quietly gag as he turned away from me and rested his fingers against his lips.

"Nick...I'm sorry...I—say something please," I broke out, not liking how quiet he was. Not that I could really complain considering he had every right to be angered with me.

"Y-y...you cheated on me?" he reiterated, his voice sounding even more broken and helpless. I could tell he was trying to fight back tears as he swallowed hard. He had even begun yelling yet. I was expecting that just as soon as the revelation hit him deeper.

"Yes."

Nick humourlessly laughed, slapping his hand numerous times onto his chest as he looked over to me, no amusement whatsoever radiating from him. It was more eerie if anything the way his laughter seemed to cut through the air and send a dark chill down the back of my spine.

"Wow," he spat, nodding more than once that he appeared for a second to mimic a bobbly head miniature figurine sat on the dashboard of a truck. "Wow, wow....I-I, don't even know what to think. I mean...is this real? Or is this one fucking disastrous nightmare? You're telling me that you've had an affair? Cheated on me? Is that what you're fucking saying, Rose?" he said, spitting his words harshly.

"Yes, I'm---"

"---Fuck you, Rose," he barked, kicking the side of the single sofa with his foot hard. "Fuck you!" he turned pointing his finger at me. "How? Why? Why would you do that? Why would you cheat on me? I fucking love you Rose. I thought you loved me. And now...this?"

I began rubbing my palms anxiously together. "It just...--"

"---Don't you fucking dare say it just happened. It doesn't just happen, Rose. Who was it, hm? Some fucking delivery boy? Hm? Got yourself on a dating app? Hooking up with complete strangers? Who was it Rose!" he demanded to know, grabbing a pillow off the couch and throwing it out into the hallway. "Who!" Turning over the sofa as he squatted down and lifted it onto its side.

I jumped back, my bottom lip quivering hating as I then watched my husband break down into millions of pieces. He cried in agony throwing his head into his hands, his back facing towards me. Every inch of him shivered. He was completely devastated.

"Who was it!" he yelled, turning around. I could see the full consequences of my actions. Tears were rolling down. His eyes were red. Watery snot rested just above his lip. He was completely heartbroken. And what else should I have expected? For him to smile and say it was alright?

"When did it happen? For how long Rose?" he interrogated.

I just froze unable to answer him.

"Tell me!" he roared snapping me out of my slight trance.

"I—I, a couple of months," I confessed.

"Oh fucking hell," he cried, running both hands through his hair in frustration. "Months? You've been sleeping around with someone else for months? What the fuck was wrong with us, Rose!"

"I-I-I wasn't happy...I haven't been for some time...I-I...I'm sorry, Nick," I replied, knowing how pathetic I sounded and completely monstrous I was for causing this.

Nick sniffled, inhaling hard. He wiped away hard at his tears. "I'll ask again. Who was it Rose?"

I didn't want to tell him. I couldn't.

"Don't do this to me, Rose. You fucking owe me an answer!" he snapped, making me jump on the spot.

"It was nobody," I lied.

"You're going to fucking protect them?" he said in disgust. He held his hands up in disbelief. I remained mute as a mouse unable to find the words to calm the situation.

"I—it all makes sense. Not wanting to have kids. Ah, god. Was...was you sleeping with them when we met my parents? And what...what about the time when I had a work trip? Was you fucking sleeping with them then?" he said with bitterness laced throughout his tone.

"Yes," I said defeatedly.

"You fucking bitch," he said slow and calm. Nick sniffled once more before wetting his bottom lip as he turned to his hand and immediately slid his wedding ring off his finger. "Never in a million of years would I have thought you would have cheated on me, Rose. Never. And yet you have and you continue to protect whoever you made your bed with," he added, sliding the ring onto radiator behind the turned over chair. "We're done." He swallowed looking at me with deadly serious eyes enough to eliminate me there on the spot.

"Nick...please, can't we talk about this?" I croaked, tears now breaking down my face as it dawned on me the unsettling truth. "Please," I begged, "we can work through this."

"I could never bring myself...to love you ever again," he spat, before hastily leaving through the living room door.

"Nick!" I yelled, storming after him but failing to reach him in time as he got into his car parked just a couple cars down our road and sped off. I yelled after him. "Nick!" Nick! Please!" I sobbed hard, dropping to my knees not caring if my neighbours across the road or adjacent could see my distress.

Moments later I felt two arms cradle me from behind. I knew who it was immediately and turned into their embrace. Shane held me close, consoling me as he muttered words of endearments.

"It's okay. I get you through this. Sssh, sssh," he whispered, rocking me back and forth. I didn't stop crying. I couldn't. The reality was finally starting to sink. I had lost my husband. The man who had undeniably loved me with all of his heart. And now we were over. There was no mending the broken pieces I had shattered. 

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