My Poems

My Face

My Face - Nichole (chckinlil)

I can't take back the mistakes I've made

the people I've let take so much of me.

I will never forget waking up bruised

my jaw broken, my nose too.

Both of my eyes black and blue.

I cried the day he left because he loved me right?

I moved on, unable to tell him I went crazy.

I gave into someone else letting him belittle me,

push me to the edge until I went crazy.

But he left me after the wound

was big enough for the world to see.

I sat alone many a nights

crying holding a pen in my hand

writing with tears in my eyes.

Rehashing pain and memories

worrying about my daughter because I was too far gone

another growing deep inside.

I had been defeated, dehumanized made into an animal

I would look at the pen knowing

it should really be a knife.

If someone else could hurt me, cut me, wound me

why not me?

I ended up cutting myself

the more I bled the more I cried

the more I would cut the deeper I would go

the better I would feel.

Here I am today full of new wounds

no longer cutting my own

but letting others do it for me.

I gave up a long time ago

when I lost so much of me.

My face.