Love = Pain (Kamisero)

Chap 12~ Dear Hanta

⚠️Trigger warning later in chapter! I will be giving a warning so you can read freely!⚠️

Denki P.O.V

Bakugo has just left. I had texted Mina to tell her she could come up. She raced in the door. "I just saw Bakugo leave with a fucking police officer. Don't you DAREEEE tell me that it was that fucking whore that dared to be in this room." She said very angrily. "Mina.. calm down and listen." Kiri said. She didn't move a muscle. "Ashido. Please." She widened her eyes at the use of her last name. None of the bakusquad ever used her last name. She sighed and sat in the seat next to Kiri. "Okay. Thank you." Kiri said before taking a breath and starting to explain.

"When I saw Bakugo, I flipped out too, but he explained something to me. I also recorded it incase I needed to use it as backfire but I'm not mad anymore." She began to protest and ask why he wasn't mad. "MINA! Listen." I jumped at the sudden outburst. Kiri pulled out his phone and you could begin to hear Bakugo talking. I had already heard this story twice so as Mina listened and Kiri continued to keep her from freaking out, I walked over to Seros bed. Its been so hard without him and I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. The past 4 days he's been out has been the worst heartbreak ever. I miss having out meme competitions at 4 am, (we all know they'd do that) I miss playing Mario kart with him, I miss literally rolling over laughing because it started with one joke and we just kept adding things to make it funnier.

I didn't realize how long I've been just sitting there staring at his face and thinking about everything I miss doing with him, so when Kiri tapped my shoulder I jumped a bit. "Oh, sorry for scaring you. The nurse needs you to move so she can check him." He says pointing to the nurse on the other side of Sero's bed, setting things up. I nod and sit up.

We all just sit in the chairs on the side of the room quietly. They had finished listening to the voice recording and im sure they didn't feel comfortable talking about it with the nurse in the room. The nurse nods to us before leaving the room. I took back my seat as Kiri and Mina began talking about what Bakugo had said. I returned to looking down at Sero. "Why couldn't I man up and tell you before.." I silently sobbed. "I miss you so much Sero..." I buried my hands in my face as I started to cry. I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up to see Mina, I couldn't see her that well since my tears blurred my vision. She just stood next to me, hand on my shoulder, looking down me with a soft and sad smile. "Its going to be okay Kami. He's going to wake up soon. Im sure he is." She said with a sweet tone of voice before pulling me into a hug. I hear footsteps and then another arm covering my back. "Y'know what this proves though?" I hear Kiri say. "Hm?" Mina and I both mumble. "That we can be really strong even through this much pain. Its very manly." Kiri says as we all let go and he gives a big thumbs up. Mina and I sigh and laugh a bit . "Especially you Kami. We all know this is hardest for you." He states in a more serious tone. I shrug.

"Do you guys wanna go out tomorrow? I know it wont be the same without Sero and Bakugo but maybe it will get out minds off of this for a little bit. Plus everyone from school will be well, in school. I also just recently got some money!" Mina says as we walk out of the hospital. "Sure! That is a good idea.." Kiri says matter of factly. "Kami?" Mina says, waving in front of me. "Oh yeah sorry.. that sounds nice." I say. I probably wont really feel like going out but it is a good idea. Its better then sitting in my bedroom or the hospital crying. Plus im pretty sure tomorrow is the day Seros parents will be visiting all day so. "Where should we go?" Kiri asks. They get into a conversation as I start to drift off.

"Kami? That sound good to you?" I hear as im brought back to reality. "Huh? Oh uhh yeah. That sounds good." I say, not knowing what I was answering. They both snicker. "What?" I ask, confused. "I asked if you wanted to go get a major makeover at the pinkest spa we could find." She says. "Whaaaa nooooooo!" I say loudly. "I was kidding chill out. I just wanted to see if you were paying attention. We decided on just the mall or arcade or something that we can deicide tomorrow if thats fine with you." She explains their conversation. "Oh, yeah thats fine." I say as Kiri says goodbye before turning down a road. We wave and say goodbye back. "See you guys later!" He says. He was going home for a few hours with his parents tonight as they wanted to check on him since they know how heartbreaking it is for him. Losing one of his best friends and having his boyfriend be the reason he lost his best friend for a while though now Kiri knows it wasn't really Bakugos fault.

"Sooooo since I never got to ask you about this stuff yet.. How long have you had a crush on Sero?!" She says excitedly. "If you don't want to talk about it I understand completely." she says with a bit of disappointment in her voice. "Its fine I guess. As long as I can remember really. When I first saw him on the first day of UA. I thought he was really cute and funny and just a nice guy." I explained to her with a blush appearing on my face. "Awe!" she gushes at my reaction to talking about him. "Do you really think he likes me though?" I know Mina is like the love god or something but its still hard to believe. Now that I really think about it though I can kind of see it.

Maybe it is true.

After we finally get back to the dorms Mina goes to the other side of the rooms. "Ill text you about tomorrow okay? Or maybe see you later at the little party thing." She says before turning towards the girls side. "Party thing?" I question. She turns back around. "Yeah. I heard some people were coming down tonight and having a few snacks and playing games and stuff." She answers my question. "Oh.. Maybe." I say. She nods and waves again. I wave back as she gets on the elevator.

⚠️Trigger warning starts here I guess⚠️

I sigh, finally letting a sad frown across my face. I don't want Mina or Kiri to worry more about me but this has hit me to hard. Especially after Mina said stuff about him liking me since I realized I could have had a chance with him and now he may die. Its heartbreaking and I can't stand with the pain anymore.

I get onto the elevator and press the button to my floor. Tears start to build up behind my eyes. I probably will come up with an excuse if Mina tries to drag me to that party thing though she may not push since she understands how I feel. I finally make it to my room and I enter it, slamming my door shut. I run to my desk and grab a notepad.

Ive already decided what I will do. In 2 days will be the last day that im alive. I can't do it tomorrow because I can't cancel on Mina and Kiri without them worrying and im not good at faking being sick so thats out of the question. Tomorrow I will find a reason to buy a rope. Thats the easiest way. I don't want to hurt Mina, Kiri, and Bakugo even more then they are already but I also can't deal with this pain thats eating me from the inside out.

I stare at my notepad and finally begin to right. First I wrote Bakugos note, then Kiri's, then Minas, then finally, Seros. (Sorry I don't feel like writing four notes right now so you'll only see Seros.)

Dear Hanta,

If your seeing this that means two things. One that your alive luckily and two that I'm not. I'm so sorry. Each passing day made you look worse and worse. More paler, worse breathing, more nurses checking up on you and taking lots of tests. It was to much to bare. I couldn't deal with the pain of not having you by my side. It hurt so much without you. What made that worse was the fact that I was in love with you. Yeah.. surprise! I wanted to tell you so many times, especially that night you helped me. I wanted to tell you so much that night but I didn't want to ruin our friendship. I'm so sorry Hanta and I hope you don't mind me calling you that here.. I've always wanted to use your first name. Thank you for everything you've done for me and I'm sorry I had to leave like this. Don't let this hold you back. Become the best pro hero for both of us. I love you Hanta and I always will.

~Denki Kaminari🖤💛

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Word count: 1630
Long one yEet

Sorry for sadness but it's not going to stop here.. it'll be over soon!

Anyways

Till next time🖤