[Discontinued] Not Equal

eight//inconvenience

I stare at myself in the mirror. I have pulled my hair into a bun, but I can hardly pay attention to that. All I can think about is yesterday's brutal ceremony. The sound of gunshots was ringing in my ears. I couldn't stand it.

I sigh. The power of the Males is too influential because if anyone tried to go against them, they would be outnumbered. Even if I convinced all of the Females to come with me and rebel against the Males, we would fail, because, for every one Female, there are four Males. And some of the Females are brainwashed as well. They don't understand what I'm feeling. They've been injected with drugs and that serum that the Chief Elder's son created, over and over again.

A thought suddenly hits my mind. If we were all injected, why wasn't it working on me?

A memory rushes back. I open my eyes wearily, feeling tired, sick, and terrible. I am lying on a white bed, and it does not look like the bed at home. I sit up. My eyelids feel heavy, and I am trying desperately to stay conscious. Tubes are running from my arms. I can barely see anything; it's so blurry. I grimace. Where am I?

There is a sharp piercing on my shoulder, and then my vision clears.

Several Males are standing in front of me, dressed in white suits. They are holding clipboards or trays. I stare at them anxiously.

A tiny part of me wants to ask where I am, or what happened, but for some reason, I don't. Something inside my head immediately tells me that I shouldn't ask any Questions, and I listen to it. After all, why would I even want to ask any Questions? The thought is so absurd. Why would I want to commit a Sin? I'm not a Rebel. I laugh out loud.

The Male in charge taps on his clipboard. "I assume that you are wondering where you are, but you do not wish to say." He says.

"Yes," I say, my head low, making sure not to make eye contact. The old me wouldn't have done so, but for some reason, now I did. It was just so silly to make eye contact. I was below him. It didn't make any sense for him to look into my eyes.

"You have been taken in for a necessary Check." He says.

The Male sets his clipboard down on a table. A tiny sliver of me wants to look at it, but something is telling me not to.

So I listen.

But only for a second.

My eyes flick to the clipboard. I don't think he knew that I could read, because he says nothing.

The Female, Maddilyn Carter, a Seven, was caught with interest in art, a skill exclusively for Males. Several other rules may also have been broken. Was assigned with a level three threat, and was injected with the serum. However, problems have been found, and the Female may be Immune or will express Immunity throughout the years. Since the Female is not yet a Twelve, she will not be terminated.

I stare into the reflective material of the plastic sheet. My hollowed eyes look back at me.

Suddenly, I'm staring into my mirror.

"Maddie," Mother says. "Come help and prepare breakfast."

Ellie scowls from her bed. We have a three-tier bunk bed, and she is on the top, while I am in the middle, with Mother on the bottom. She is still not very happy with me.

"Alright," I say, politely. I cross the room to the stove, and I start boiling some vegetables. I wrinkle my nose. We have to eat the same thing every day- the classic cooked carrots, peas, corn, and green beans, and a tiny piece of chicken and rice on Sundays. Every week we are given a loaf of bread and a can of fruit per home unit. Our cupboards are full of canned food and sustenance. Our daily rations are hardly enough, just enough to keep us alive, and that's it. Sometimes, if Mother does not work hard enough, they do not feed us at all. One time, they did not feed us for a whole week.