For the love of the game

Chapter 17

After a few minutes Jason convinces me to get up from the door and move to my room. I stopped crying and I don't feel anything right now.

I sit on my bed moving to the corner and I hug myself and stare straight in front of me. I don't know how long I sit and here for, but I hear the door to my room open and it's non other than Cody Bellinger.

I can see him out of the corner of my eye moving towards my bed cautiously.

I'm too tired to tell him no or to say anything for that matter. All I can do is blink.

He doesn't say anything, instead he climbs into bed and sits right next to me. I don't feel the need to pull away anymore when I'm with him. He makes me feel safe and that's all I've ever really wanted was to feel safe.

He scoots closer to me and just sits there. He doesn't try to touch me or ask me about what happened. Deep down he probably already knew. Jason told him about the bruises all over me and the can see them now.

I lean my head on cody's shoulder and close my eyes. I can feel a tear that slipped out of my eye, and I sniffle.

"I'm here for you always, you know that right?" Cody asks softly

I don't know that what happens if cody gets tired of my bullshit.
"Everyone leaves eventually cody." I say sadly looking at my hands.

"Did you know that your the strongest person I've ever met." Cody says straight up and looks right at me. His green eyes piercing into mine.

"If I was strong things would be different, we wouldn't live in this dump, I would have a better job, I wouldn't let people push me around in school." My voice cracks

"You wanna know why I think your strong? It's because life has thrown every possible obstacle there is and you didn't run. Even after everything that happened with Jackson, you still went to school, you stayed strong not only for you but for Jordan and Jason, you are the most strongest and most beautiful girl I know."

My stomach flips at cody's words. I look down at my hands and just sit there. I shake my head not knowing what to say. How can I be beautiful when I'm covered in scars and bruises, that's not beautiful.

I admire the dark purple bruises that now run along my arms. I touch my neck and I hiss at the immediate pain and pull away.

"I'll go get you some ibuprofen." I feel cody get off the bed. I decide to get up and take a shower. I feel disgusting I can still smell his scent of cologne on me, and if I don't shower I won't be able to sleep tonight.

I get clothes and my towel then head to the bathroom. I finally look at myself in the mirror and realize how much of a mess I am.

My ponytail is ruined, hair coming out of everywhere. My cheeks are tear stained and I can see all the bruises. There's a hand print on my neck. Do I deserve this is that it? Is it my fault I got raped? Should I have just kept my mouth shut and just went with what Jackson said, that I was bad in bed?

I turn on the water, and I don't wait for it to get warm. Immediately when I get in I sit down in the bath, hugging my legs. I can't cry anymore and I can barley feel the water touch my skin.

I don't know how long I sit there for, but after awhile I hear a knock on the door.
"You alright in there?" I hear cody say.