Perspective

Chapter Thirty One.

"You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so you can fly away
You gotta make a decision
Leave tonight or live and die this way"

***

I did everything short of offering my first born as a sacrifice to Satan, to get my mother to stay at my sister's this weekend.

In short, I bribed her.

I told her Frankie was having an important party over at his house, and I didn't want to drive home late and wanted to stay the night; immediately the guilt tripping started.

However, there's nothing a carton of beer and two packets of 30 cigarettes won't fix for her.

I'm now dead broke until I get paid again, but it's not like that's, that unusual, I'm sure I'll manage.

I always do.

If cigarettes weren't nearly $40 a packet and a carton wasn't nearly $60 it wouldn't be so bad.

I feel like it may be cheaper for her to have a daily heroin habit at this point.

I mean, she does technically have one already - It's just prescribed heroine. And she gets that for nearly free because of her disability payment.

Oh well, at least she went to my sister's.

I'm sure I'll be the topic of discussion the whole time, and how selfish I was being; how much of a favour mum was doing me letting me just go off for the night and how she's such a caring mother because of it.

I'm still gonna owe her for this.

Work dragged on, as it usually does. However my shift this time was spent with Sam giving me cheeky smiles and teasing me about the Mr. British accent that dropped me off at work.

God he was like a school girl snickering at me all night.

To be fair, Sam hasn't seen me around anything male besides him and Frankie since I started working here and I found out for the first few months he actually thought I was gay.

Apparently when men I would serve would try to talk to me I'd get a look on my face like I just smelled sour milk, and he thought it was because I preferred women.

I just prefer being left alone.

Well, I use to, because tonight I had this annoying pit of excitement in my stomach that I kept trying to will away the closer it got to me finishing.

I don't like getting excited, simply because I don't like being disappointed and that's all that seems to happen.

I kept thinking back to Harry dropping me home last night; following me to my door and hovering around with small conversation as he shifted back and forth on his feet.

He seemed nervous, and it's still a bizarre look on him.

I didn't know what to make of it, when he pulled the pig ornament from his pocket and handed it to me; giving me a simple explanation when he saw the puzzled look on my face.

"Now you can't bail on me. I'll need to get my lucky charm back."

Sly thing he is.

By the time I finished work my nerves were eating me alive and I hated it. I hated how much anticipation I had seeing Harry now, that nervous feeling that flutters in your gut and then drops the minute you lay eyes on them.

He's woven his way into my mind, slowly solved all the puzzle pieces to the several escape rooms I have in place to block people getting to close.

And it's like without any effort one by one, he's making his way through each room and getting closer.