Mute [m.yg + k.js]

14) Unintentional Discover

Last night

She began pondering about what to do next because it was clear that she did not want to leave his house so soon. Pouring another cup of tea for herself, she realised how peaceful and silent the house was, with the quiet 'tappings' of Yoongi's typing upstairs, but it felt even more lonesome than calming to Jisoo. It made her miss her own cheerful voice again, because even while she was isolated from everyone and all that surrounded her was the torturing tranquility, Jisoo would just have the urge to talk to herself and she would feel composed again. To conclude this, Jisoo needed to feel like she was present, to accompany the thoughts in her headspace, to remind herself that a presence was there to listen to her, or support her to the fullest. It was like all Jisoo needed was herself, and especially her ability to talk, but it had gone so unexpectedly that she couldn't do anything about it.

Jisoo sighed heavily, instantly annoyed that even that could not be heard. Everything she did was becoming unsually quiet now that people would assume she were originally like that. Taking a deep breath, she contemplated briefly if she should do this, having not tried it in years. She feared she would lose her voice even more, but there wasn't anything to lose anymore, at most she had to wait a few years more before she could try it again. With that thought, Jisoo channeled all the energy, pushed vibrations up from her throat and with all the air she had, let out an ear-piercing scream.

****
Her throat immediately went dry, pain spread through it and Jisoo felt like there were needles hurting her insides, squeezing her lungs together against her small heart. Jisoo began to wheeze, then choking on the dusty, cold, foreign air and then cough vigorously. She couldn't handle that rawness of her throat, nor the fact that she had failed once again. This agonizing feeling continued for awhile.

Yoongi got concerned when the noise was getting louder, thus rushing down the stairs to see what happened. His eyes widened, witnessing Jisoo in a state of despair. Her face almost looked like it was turning blue and all she could do was inhale more air until she choked on it. Jisoo's hand reached out to grab the cup of tea in the counter, but she was too focused on the pain in her throat and lack of air, that she was unsure of whether to drink or not. Yoongi was already beside her in no time. Tears formed at the sides of her eyes, becoming watery as she glanced at Yoongi for help. She wanted so much for it to stop.

Unsure of what was wrong, he could only reassure Jisoo by stroking her back gently, advicing her to take in deep breathes and out. Once Jisoo had calmed down and her gasping of air reduced, he swiftly took the cup and blew the tea to cool it down. "It's okay now, I'm here. You should drink." he told her, his voice almost a soft whisper in her ears. Yoongi could hear Jisoo sob a few times as she drank her tea.

"You can tell me anything, you know. I hate seeing you sad like this," he whispered once again beside her. She took a quick glance at his unmoving stance, staring at her notebook beneath her hands. Jisoo could tell Yoongi wanted to know so eagerly, but she chose not to tell him. How could she tell him that she still longed for her voice after all the insecurities that she overcame by herself? How is she supposed to stay strong for Yoongi once he knew that she had a weak side? Why wouldn't she need to be mute when it was what formed her friendship with Yoongi, and brought them closer?

Did you hear the scream?

"No," Yoongi whipped his head around and turned back to Jisoo, "Why? Are you hurt?" she knew she shouldn't have asked. She did not want him to get any ideas about what she was doing just awhile ago. It would have made her look dumb to have taken such a big risk for something that would never happen, except she thought it was merely possible for her that she still attempted.

Pretending to feel better, Jisoo shook her head lightly, having a small smile on her face as she picked up the pencil,

I just stupidly choked on a biscuit earlier, it was so dry. Don't worry now