Burnt Sienna (Hemlock Grove // Roman Godfrey AU)

Healed

Destiny kept Peter and me at her house for a two weeks instead of one. When she was completely sure were okay, she hauled us over to our house. 

"And remember, the both of you will not hesitate to call me the moment you feel something is wrong. Okay?" she had said when she dropped us off. 

Peter was healing surprisingly fast. So was I. I was glad everything was okay now. At least most of it. I still battled with what I should do next. 

The morning after we came home, Peter slept way overtime. But it was needed. He needed rest. More rest= faster healing. I had woken up pretty early that morning. There was knock at the door, and I thought it was Destiny being all worried again. I opened the door to see Roman instead. 

"May I come in?" he asked. 

"I suppose," I said. "Peter is asleep, and I'm not about to wake him up for you."

"That's alright. I-uh- I actually came to see you."

"Me?" I furrowed my forehead. "What could you possibly want from me now?"

"Nothing. I don't want anything. I just came to talk."

"There's nothing to talk about," I replied.

"Sienna, listen. I know you're angry at me. And will probably always be. I get that. But I wanted to tell you this- I am sorry. For the countless times I've wronged you, hurt you, yelled at you, cursed at you. I could go on, but rambling doesn't make it better. I just wanted to let you know how terrible I felt. When that vargulf ripped your heart out, I thought you would die. And I felt guilty. I realized I was a monster. And I'm probably never going to change from that, but I'm glad you're alive right now to hear this. If something happened to you that night, I would've never forgiven myself."

Instead of saying anything positive, I looked at Roman for a few seconds. "Why do you even care if I'm alive or dead. I think it's pretty clear that you give don't give two rips about me or my well-being."

"Who told you that?!" Roman said.

"Your words and actions," I sighed and wanted to go to my bedroom. 

"Are you going to leave?" Roman asked.

"That's none of your business," I said. 

"Nadia will miss you," he said.

"Don't try to drag your daughter into this. You didn't think of her missing me when you stopped letting me see her. How pretentious can you be." I close my eyes in frustration and started to walk to my bedroom. 

"Sienna, don't leave. What will I do without you?"

"Find someone else to be your emotional throw-pillow. I'll do whatever I think is best."

"Why are you being so cold?" Roman asked.

"Maybe- maybe it's because the last time I wasn't cold, the last time I trusted you, you broke it. And trust, unlike upirs, doesn't just self-heal and get better in an instant. It hurts. And it's your fault. And it's way too early for all this nonsense. This overpowering sweetness doesn't suit you."

"Fine. Fine, I'll leave. Tell Peter I said hi. Goodbye, Sienna."

"Yeah," I said as I finally walked into my bedroom and slammed the door. Roman Godfrey made me mad. But part of me wished there was something genuine in all he said. I shoved the thoughts off and went to sleep. Best thing to do when you don't feel like thinking. 

A month and a half past. I started working at a cafe downtown since Peter couldn't help pay the bills for a while. Better people, better interaction, better work environment. Peter was now almost healed. He continued to be the sweetest and most understanding person I have had in life so far. I was fine too. Destiny dropped in and out. Sometimes, she stayed the night. Sometimes she would only come to drop off cookies. We were the best of friends.