I know I have already did this on my message board but I want to post chapter about it. So I am sorry if I act cocky or anything in similarity, but I really have to get myself props. Despite me being doubtful and always talking negatively about my work, I have came a long way.
I started off in 2017 with my first book, Everyday Thang, it got unpublished due to it being so cringey. *shudders*
But it will be making a comeback soon! I was inspired after discovering bone thugs-n-harmony. I was so into them that I wanted to write a book about them living in south central LA, being in gangs and wanted to get out by making themselves better. It starred with them and others. The book had an all-star cast and was a genre of action, romance, drama, and comedy. I thought it would be great to put my favorite genres together and mix it. I just hate to write just one, ya know?
Anyways, I thought the book would stick around it once I got started. After that, I post a first chapter. It was cringey and I just came up with it. I know I should have took my time but I was just in rush of things. It is one of the reasons why I unpublish my stories, I don't take time to think. 😂
But people started commenting saying they like it and that made me continue. I write a few more chapters until I read my own book and start to realize it was terrible. Despite getting positive feedback, it didn't make me feel any better. I wanted my writing to be amazing. I wanted my writing to be how I want it to be. *sighs*
I put a lot of pressure on myself during that time. Being on google and searching for how to write better? Ugh. I almost lost it.
I had to unpublish the book then move on to a book that an amazing friend of mine (RuthlessLadiiNee) suggested me to do. I still give her all the credit to this day. During the time I became a bone thugs fan, I also became a Mya fan. I knew who she was.
As a kid, I watched her videos on TV. I remember standing in front of my TV and watching My Love is Like Wo. Man, those outfit changes and tap dancing? Whew lordy, it left me speechless. I wanted to do something like that once in my life but I knew it won't be like the video. 😂
But Janee gave me the idea to do a fanfic called Movin' On. The title is from the song by Mya. I wish I had went with the video first but me being indecisive, it was hard as hell. All the ideas I came up with where good. I just didn't know what to choose from. So she wrote the first chapter for me and I gave her credit at the end. I should have gave her the book. Like, foreals.
After that, the book became popular and I continued to write it. But in the midst of that, I still feel crappy about my writing. I would read other people's books (including my friends) and wish I had their writing skills. They are good at everything and are better than me. It made me sad. I really pray and wish that I had their skills but receiving a lot of motivation, I had to remember that my writing is different. I shouldn't overwork myself to be the best.
I shouldn't compare.
I shouldn't doubt.
No.
And even if I do get motivated, I will still unpublish then republish. It's annoying as hell tbh. But most of the books I had before were written for people and not for myself. I know y'all disappointed but I should have thought with what I want and not others. 😔
I'm stepping out of that zone and beginning to write stories that I find fun + plus need recognition. I create stories that come from my mind or the stories from my family members or friends that inspired me.
Stories I love that I know others would love to. I apologize if I didn't listen to any of you guys. The ones who told me repeatedly that I have amazing writing skills and I am a great writer. It's normal to do that but everyday, I motivate myself and keep going. Cause Dee gots something to say. ❤
I am getting off topic again! Lol! Super sorry, lovelies. But unpopular opinion: I am an amazing writer.
And I deserve credit for my work. (Not trying to sound cocky)
From my cast to soundtrack, I can't believe that I am freaking good at this, like, wow girl. 😂
Again, not trying to sound cocky. I had to honor myself. Cause I am that girl who uses her creativity to create books that I wanted to share with you guys.
And to me, girl, continue to do what you are born to do. Even if your book isn't all that, continue to shine. Cause you are that girl. Will always be that girl. I fucking love you and everything you do. You tell stories, create amazing characters, and more. Gosh, you deserve a lot of love. You are everything. Never forget that shit! And this is not going to me but to others who have been through the same thing. My love, don't let those votes, comments, or anything affect you from being creative. You betta unleash and make that motherfucking magic! Cause baby, you gots something to sayyyyy! Come on now!
Anyways, that's all.
Sorry if this look wacked. I tried to explain myself the best way I could. 😂
I love you, Deanna. Continue to be an amazing spirit. Inspire others with your motivation and stories. And I love YOU, never stop creating magic. Share your creativity. Never be afraid.
Dee is out!
