Be Careful What You Wish For (Frerard)

6.

Gerard's POV

Actually watching Frank smile is something that made a lot of things click in my brain. I had dreamed of this day since I started writing Frank as a character, meeting someone in real life exactly like him. I created him to be my dream guy, the person I had always wanted in my life. He's my favorite character that I've ever created, the one that I'd say I hold the closest to my heart. And now he's standing right in front of me. But I don't feel happy? I feel like I've somehow cheated at this game of life in which everyone else is struggling so hard. Then I thought about what Pete said.

"Cheating at what? Life? You didn't create him Gerard, he fell into your lap."

While I can understand that he's right, there's a part of me that can't shake the nervous feeling in my stomach. The guilty feeling on my conscience telling me that this isn't right.

Realistically I understand that this isn't my fault. I know that I didn't create Frank in real life and brainwash him to be the way I wanted him to be, I get that. However, that leaves so many questions unanswered. If I didn't do it, then who did? The only people who have ever seen the document that involves Frank are me, Pete, and Mr.Rose. However, that also gets me nowhere. Neither Me, Mr.Rose or Pete would have a reason to do this. I also happen to know that Pete is a terrible liar and actor. If it was him, I have a feeling that I'd have figured it out by now. So how the fuck did this happen?! This can't be a coincidence, the odds of that actually being the case are slim to none.

"EARTH TO GEE!" Is the thing that is said in my ear to break me out of this trance-like state. When I finally do come back to Earth, I look up to see Pete looking at me with wide eyes and a very scared expression evident on his face. The same look of concern is evident on Frank's face.

I just blink at them. "What?" I ask.

" dude, I've been trying to get your attention for like 10 minutes! It's like you were in some sort of trance or something; I was starting to get worried that I'd never be able to pull you out of it." Pete said.

"Oh, I'm sorry." I say sincerely. "I was thinking."

"Thinking about what?" Frank asks.

I glance over at Pete and he immediately understands. I can tell by the glare that he shoots my way.

"Nothing in particular." I say. "Just random things." I say, not wanting to tell Frank that he was the reason for my indirect breakdown.

"Hey Frank, how about I take Gee to the bathroom and make sure he's okay. We'll be right back okay?" He says, and now it's my turn to shoot him a glance.

"GERARD!THE FUCK!" He whisper-yells at me the second that the bathroom door it closed.

"What?" I ask innocently.

"Don't 'what' me Gerard. You're doing it again." He says.

"Doing what??" I retort.

"Blaming yourself!" He says. " you're thinking too much about where he came from, who made him, blah blah blah. Just live in the moment Gee! You're not cheating at life that's not possible. You know that." He finishes.

"I know you're right." I say. "I just can't stop myself from thinking too much into it. And I just feel like I have an unfair advantage."

"Gee, millions of people in this world have an advantage. This world is full of people who have advantages over others, you're not the only one."

After he finishes a take a moment to let what he said really sink in. He's 100% right. So what if I have an advantage? It's not my fault that he fell into my lap, I didn't make that happen. It happened purely on its own. But now, because of all my freaking out, my dream guy is sitting by himself in my dorm room. And I'm sitting here with Pete in the bathroom. What is wrong with me?!

"Oh my god you're right." I say with wide eyes. It's almost like something he said flipped a switch in my brain. My whole attitude did a 180 as I realized that I could be spending quality time with someone who I absolutely adored.

"And he's sitting out there all alone oh god oh fuck." I say, immediately getting up from my spot on the toilet and practically running over to my bed.

I see him laying on my bed, phone in his hand, and jacket and shoes long discarded on the floor.

It takes him a second to recognize me but when he does he immediately perks up and drops his phone onto the bed, looking up at me.

"Hey! Are you okay? Or, back to earth I guess." He says with a smile and a slight breathy laugh.

"No yeah, I'm great now." I say with a smile.

A couple seconds later Pete emerges from the bathroom with a smile on his face.

"What are you so happy about?" I ask teasingly.

He smiles once again. "Well, it looks like you guys are gonna have a dorm room to yourself because I am going to hang out with Patrick."

"Oh my god." I say, borderline squealing. "I'm so happy for you! You're gonna have so much fun!"

"Yeah I know, I'm just a little nervous is all." He says.

"Well, the only advice I have for you is wear that tight pair of jeans that make your ass look great, wear a simple shirt andddd make sure to bring a condom." I say with a wink.

"Oh ha ha." He says while picking out some clothes. This isn't a date, we're just hanging out."

"Well, then I guess you just gotta show him what he's missing out on."