Catch Me

Ch. 9

Coralys pov

It's crazy how therapy really helps people. Because I feel nothing but angry right now. I feel betrayed. I feel vulnerable. I feel very depressed. I feel naked almost. I've held onto this secret for so long and for someone to know it makes me feel like I've had a weight taken off me. I feel lighter and less heavy. The feeling making me feel naked and vulnerable.

I didn't like therapy before this, but I've never hatred or more than now. I've never believed less in therapy than I do now.

"Coraly, I know it's a hard thing to speak about your past. But Demi isn't the first person to know about it. Dianna and Eddie knew so much of it, you were just unaware of that. Demi can relate to-" Kelly says and I snap my head to her and she stops mid sentence realizing she's only making me angrier by the second.

"Shut up! You don't fucking know how to help and you're not! You don't know anything yourself and haven't gone through a fucking thing I have! Stop trying to give advice completely blind! You're not helping! No one knows my entire story and I'm fucking fed up with everyone thinking they do! I'm not weak stop treating me like I am! I can handle my own shit! I have done it for 14 years and I don't need help now! Everyone thinks they know me and they fucking don't! Stop trying to get me to talk to someone else because they get shit you don't and want me to open up more! I don't want to open up! I have made it this fucking far alone and I don't plan to change that now! I'm done! FUCK OFF!" I say before storming out of the room.

I slam the door behind me before storming out of the office and going into the hallway of the building the office is located in. I just feel my anger at an entirely new level and I don't know how to calm down. I'm just so angry. Something I don't usually feel because I'm normally to scared to express anger.

I stand against the wall for a few moments before Demi reunites with me. She says nothing just looks at me as if to question if I want to walk or not.

I remain still and let my head fall to the floor. My anger dissipating in a matter of seconds and being replaced with the usual depression.

Coraly stop being a fuck up. You want to get out of Dema and yet every time you break free, you allow yourself to go back. Stop being stupid. Get to trench and allow people to help you. Stop pushing help away, stop being a fuck up. Your mind is being played with by Nico, take it back. Why do you coward out each time people try to help? You want to quit therapy because it's getting to personal. You want people to care but when they do, you panic. You get defensive and scared. Stop being scared. Stop being a fucking coward. Just a few months ago you wanted therapy, you wanted help. Accept it.

"We don't have to wait here for the other 20 minutes of the appointment you know. If you want to leave we can leave. That's your decision. No ones going to be upset." Demi says.

I avoid eye contact with her and silently follow her out of the building. The elevator was filled with awkward tension and when we get to her car, I take the backseat. The action doesn't go unnoticed by Demi but she doesn't say anything or question it.

The car ride was awkward, long, silent, and uncomfortable to say the least. When we get to her house I head to the kitchen and walk to the medicine cabinet. She doesn't say anything, but she does watch me closely from a far.

I scan the options in front of me and grab the benedryl. Not for allergies, in fine when it comes to allergies. I just want to end the rest of today and sleep it away. I doubt me asking Demi for her own medication to achieve sleep is going to work. So I'm just taking the next best thing. It works. I know that much.

"I didn't realize you weren't feeling well. Why didn't you say anything?" She asks.

"I'm a big girl, I can handle my own problems. I'm not sick, you can stop worrying. Thanks." I say popping 3 benedryl pills out of the package.