Looking For Space // Josh Kiszka

V

I don't know if any of you have ever been on a ride like the Gyrosphere, which is no longer at my local amusement park, but it was sincerely the most exhilarating ride there was. And yes, you had to wait forever in line to get on it. Anyway. Hope y'all enjoy...

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"Oh come on, you've got this," I said to Josh as he braced himself in front of the booth, dart in hand. The tip of his tongue was between his lips in his state of concentration, his eyes dead-set on the multicolored balloons pinned to the board.

Josh crouched, hooking his arm back with his forearm up, then tossed the dart, managing to pop a blue balloon. I gasped in shock and excitement--he'd managed to pop almost all of them so, although he didn't get a prize, I thought he did pretty well, especially considering I'd only managed to pop three.

"Damn," he muttered, though he was smiling. "I really wanted to win you something."

I laughed. "What would you win for me?"

Josh nudged my arm. "What about that purple elephant? It's cute."

"It is cute. One of us will win something," I replied. "Although the prices of these games are pretty steep."

"One more game," Josh said, taking out his wallet again. The simple black leather looked so dull in comparison to the red, flinty floral patterned shirt he was wearing, with red shorts to match. "One more game and if I don't win the elephant, we'll go on that old rickety roller coaster you so desperately want to ride."

I chuckled--the amusement park date was proving to be, what I thought was anyway, the perfect opportunity to see Josh at his most authentic. That really wasn't much unlike how he was normally as far as I knew, but watching him bop around was more endearing to me than I cared to admit. His face was lit up the whole time, he was smiling at everything, truly like a little kid just marveling at the world.

It made me feel good to see him like that. I felt like I could let go and be the same way.

Josh held the darts in his hand, bracing himself all over again, except that time, he only managed to pop two balloons.

He turned away from the counter, pouting. "I really wanted to get you the elephant."

I put my arm around his shoulder. "I appreciate that. But you've spent enough money trying," I said, then twirled a lock of his hair between my fingers. "Let's go on that roller coaster."

"Oh god, it hurts so much," Josh said with a laugh and, when I dropped my arm back to my side, he took my hand in his.

Even something as slight as hand-holding had never been my thing in public, but Josh's hand was soft and warm and him squeezing mine made my heart race--he seemed to be good at making that happen.

When we sat in the seats for the roller coaster, Josh returned his hand in mine, our forearms pressed against the middle divider, until the attendant started the ride and the metal bar came down over our laps.

"You ready?" I asked, turning my head towards him.

He nodded. "I'm ready, darling."

My breath hitched as we went up the first hill, the wheels creaking and sputtering beneath us, and while I remained silent except for exhaling the lungfuls of air I had inhaled on the way up, Josh let out a loud, open-mouthed scream as we descended. It distracted me from what was actually going on and I turned to look at him as best I could, his face adorned with a massive smile as his hands clutched the metal bar.

It was really rickety--we bumped around so much that I felt every vibration and rough patch on the tracks, the bouncing radiating through my spine. When we got to the second big hill I caught my breath again. Josh reached for my hand wound tight around the bar and rested his over mine, the smooth skin of his palm draped over my knuckles. As we descended again, I muttered, "Oh fuck" and he turned to me and laughed before emitting his own yelp.