Looking For Space // Josh Kiszka

VI

I promised an anon on tumblr that I would post this a bit earlier because of the ~anticipation.~

Please believe me when I say I really had no intentions of making this smutty but, ultimately, I should have known better--it's me, after all. So, fair warning: some pretty fluffy smut. Read at your own discretion. 

---

Panic and excitement mingled in my blood so furiously that I couldn't decipher which I felt more of--but I hoped it was the latter--as Josh turned the key to his apartment door. I couldn't even note any of the decor though because a long-haired, lanky guy who looked just like Josh but not quite was sprawled out on the couch.

"Hey," he said, his eyes going to me.

"We're going to my room, Jake," Josh declared loudly and took my hand, leading me down the hall and into his room, promptly shutting the door behind us.

"Is that your brother?" I asked, looking around the room. I was wrong about a lot, like the bedspread--it was a deep maroon, not blue--and there weren't any clothes on the floor; there was a shelf full of records and a shelf full of books next to a record player; but there was a dream catcher above the bed, which made me laugh quietly to myself.

"My twin," Josh replied. "Of course, I'm 5 minutes older than him."

"No need for introductions, I see."

Josh waved his hand. "You don't wanna talk to Jake, darling. He'll only bore you."

"Or are you worried I might like your twin more than you?" I asked, joking, although I wasn't sure if he got it.

"No," was all he said in response, his cheeks turning pink.

"I don't know, Josh--he was pretty cute," I teased, returning to looking around the room, glossing over the books--the kid was a reader. "Might even be cuter than you."

Josh clucked his tongue and rolled his eyes before going over to the records. It only took him a few seconds before he pulled one out of the shelves and held it up to me. "Do you like Fleet Foxes?"

Anything to drown out my thoughts. "Yeah, some of their stuff."

Josh put the record on and, as he looked at the player, stepped backward, his hands up at his sides as if he were about to start dancing, before turning back to me. "It's a good album."

"I'm sure," I replied, feeling very exposed in the middle of his room, not to mention because his brother had to bear witness to Josh and I charging in here so abruptly. I nodded to myself, looking at the floor for a moment, before sitting on the edge of Josh's bed.

He went next to me then laid down, rolling on his side. "We don't have to do anything," he said. "Especially not if you think Jake is cuter than me."

I laughed a little. "Oh please," I replied, lying down next to him, mentally summoning Fleet Foxes to absorb my thoughts. The covers smelled like him--I had to resist the urge to spread myself over them completely. "I don't know if that's possible."

Josh smiled and leaned forward, placing his hand on the side of my neck as he went in for a kiss. It was gentle and soft and his hand was carefully placed on my neck until he moved it down to my chest, resting it flat over my heart.

"Is this normal for you?" he asked, smiling a little, his eyes on his own hand.

"My heartbeat?"

"It's very fast."

I felt myself blush. I reached out and slipped my hand under his shirt, pressing it against his own chest--his heart was racing too, though not quite as fast as mine. I kept my palm flat against his chest as my fingertips grazed over his skin, so warm and soft.