Warm December's

(1)

Forgetting everything that happened in my life was easier than I thought, even if the tears couldnt be hidden as easily. I just live life a way I would have never lived it before. Don't let people in, don't show emotion, dont show you care. For me its what I have to do.

"We are going to be late!" I hear my best friend Emma yell from across the room, making me come back to reality and out of my thoughts. I sigh and look away from the small window in front of me.

"Why did I agree to do this...? I laugh, standing there in front of her second guessing everything. How did she convince me that going to Florida was a good idea? Looking back I remember the words that caught my eyes "for a new start" she said. I had lost everyone I care about because of one person, who was after me because I was gone. Now, getting away was the only other option to keep me alive. As much as I didnt want to run, I couldnt let him win. I couldnt let him take even more from me.

Emma still stood there with her long blonde hair that reflected the light, dark brown eyes that seemed to bright up a room every time you see them but dark enough you could get lost in them. Her smile made everyone smile, it was contagious. She was just 17 as was I and life wasnt getting any easier. She smiled and gave me a look I had been used to for as long as I can remember.

Because we both need this. Well be fine. I promise. She turns. Its gonna be fun! She yells.

I shake my head and try not to smile. I walk over to the beige wall and look at myself through the mirror. The girl I used to be seems almost gone. Yes, I still looked the same, but the girl that seemed so innocent and young, was broken, and no longer seen. I have long brown hair that was wavy most of the time and went down to my stomach. I have blue gray eyes that people say look unique. Now, my smile rarely came out anymore. I tended to hide it more than show it. Emma and I are totally different people. Shes the type to stay in while I want to party. Thats the one thing that didnt change about me. Ive always been like this, always up for something.

I take my eyes away from the mirror and look at the unzipped blue bag on the floor. Everything I had fit into it. I mean, I was packing up everything and moving. I lean over and zip up the bag. I stand up smiling and lean against wall now waiting for my best friend to finish her makeup.

"Ready to go?" She asks walking out.

"As ready as I'll ever be" I tell her. I pick up my bag as I walk out of the apartment into the hall with Emma right behind me. When I hear the door close it finally occurs to me that this is the last time I might ever see this place again. All the memories start to hurt my head. I miss it, I miss them.

"Emma I'm scared." I say in a soft tone starting to get worried this was the wrong idea.

"Look, you've been through a lot. Weve been through a lot! I need you to stay safe, I need you to find someone who can take care of you!" I laugh and nod my head. Shes always been there for me, anytime I needed her. I take one last look at apartment 105. This is the place where I grew up. This is the place where I was happy and had no worries. This is the place, I had my family. I walk down the one set of stairs to the black car.

"Are you sure we are doing the right thing?" I ask what seems like again.

"We are starting over. I think that will help everything go away. We can meet new people, go to a new school, learn new things. I am always here when you need something, so don't think I never am. Okay?" She says.

"Okay." I say and her face brightens as she plugs in her phone.

"What song?" She laughs, and we play, all the way to the airport, singing our hearts out to love songs, country songs, break up songs. The windows rolled down, hair flying in our face, long conversations about life, about how it used to be.

"You ready." She says again, remembering when she said it earlier as we left the apartment.

"Yep" I get out of the car to grab my things from the truck. We gather our things taking our time knowing we dont have to rush. We walk through the huge parking garage, more cars than people. I start to see what seems like an entrance from a distance. The big yellow doors made it easy to find. It was crowded and hard to get through once we made it through the doors but it was as expected. People we running all over the place and I never used to think of an airport like a mall, there were stores, restaurants everywhere. Familys together sitting at tables or walking around as we were made my heart sink. I missed them so much and it was as if my day couldnt have gotten any worse when someone bumps into my shoulder spilling a hot drink on me.

OW! Oh my god its hot! I yell and the guy in front of me doesnt seem to care.

"What the hell." I seem to yell at him when he doesnt apologize. He holds a smug look on his face.

"What!" He stood there like nothing happened.

"Do you see this?" I motioned my hand to my now stained shirt.

"Yeah so...? Next time watch where youre going and pay attention to your surroundings. Im not gonna stop just for you!" He said.

"Are you kidding me? You spilled coffee over my shirt! You bumped into me and Im perfectly capable of knowing how to walk unlike you and Im actually a decent person and know how to apologize and own up to what I do so maybe you should be the one watching where youre going and not blame it on the first person you see." I yell and he rolls his eyes.

At least you learned a lesson. Dont think you know everything. He walked away with that same smug look on his face and I hated it.

"Asshole" I say to myself.

"That guy has problems." Emma says.

"I just wish he wasn't so cute." She continued. I roll my eyes looking at the guy that walked in front of us. He had a type of fawn brown hair that was styled messy as most guys did it. His eyes were as brown as Emmas maybe even darker, so dark you couldnt seem to find the center. He was fit. You could still see his muscles through the hoodie had on and he wore a type of look I hadnt really seen anyone with, the type of look where you never knew anything.

We slowly start walking towards security. My shirt seemed to dry quicker than I thought and with a few paper towels I was okay, even if the stain might never get out. We walked for a while after the incident with the boy, stopping, then walking, stopping, and then walking but we finally reached our gate in terminal. My eyes start to hurt and groan with tiredness and all I want to do is sleep, not even thinking about the nightmares I have.

"Gate 24 is bordering now." We hear a lady dressed in uniform say over a speaker at the front desk. I turn around and see my best friend. This is all we have ever known, and now we are leaving. For the first time in so long we might both be able to be happy. I can see she is as nervous as me, leaving and never knowing if well come back. Zoning out again, Emma shakes me.

Winter! Emma yells and somehow manages to whisper at the same time.

"Next" The same lady dressed in a red uniform says. I give her my ticket and smile trying to take everything in. I walk up a little bit but wait up for Emma at the entrance of the boarding rail. We talk barely walking up to the plane. We are greeted by two nice women in the same red uniform as before. We walk down the aisle looking right then left for our seats.

"Finally!" I blurted out as I take a step into our seats. We had two seats in the same row but not next to each other so that we could maybe have an extra seat in the middle. As we sit down on either side we put our small carryon items under our seat or above us. We start to talk about what will happen if there is someone between us, and that we will figure it out if it happens. We just talk, like weve always done, except for this time, I feel its different. Just as the announcements come on to take our seat somebody stands by our seat. I look up from the floor and meet eyes with who I thought would be a stranger, but its not.

Youve got to be joking. We say in sink.

What are the chances? There are like a 1000 seats on this plane! I exaggerate talking to myself.

"Why are you here" I groan as if I didnt already know.

"If youre being clueless, I am on my way back home to Florida." And thats where it started, I thought my life had already begun but the truth was it didnt start until I got on that plane.