Love?

Your really gone

Kyles POV

As Charlotte ran out of my office it felt like she took my heart with her. I sat in my chair struggling to process what she had just told me "What have I done'. Charlotte was already had enough problems and I told her that I loved her, I loved my student. I hate how she keeps pushing me away when I've done nothing wrong, I just want to help her. I want to protect her and get rid of her problems be her solution but all I do is scare her away. 

I started pacing up and down the room; I have to forget my feelings for her. She made it clear that she doesn't like me that way. It was time to lock up my emotions and throw away the key; she was just another student that I have to teach. Walking out my office I saw a boy sitting outside the girl's bathroom, it was James Trace. A name teacher's dreaded, he had been kicked out of so many classes it was surprising he still passes with good grades (A's and B's). 

'Mr Trace, why are you sitting outside the girl's bathroom? Should you not be in class' he stared up at me not a care passing by. 

'I'm not I class because I debated an opinion and I'm sitting outside the girl's bathroom because ten minutes ago I saw Charlotte run in here crying. I was worried so I wanted to make sure she was okay. Is that a good enough explanation Sir' my locked emotions were trying to break free but I stayed professional 

'Well Mr Trace you can drop the attitude for a start and if you were worried about a student then you should come tell a teacher. Especially with what's happened recently regarding Miss Scott' I wouldn't let this kid talk down to me. Still no emotion crossed his face 

'okay say she didn't want teachers involved, getting a teacher could've made this conversation a whole lot worse' he smirked at me. That's it I had had enough of this kid 

'Mr Trace Principles office now' using my power of authority gave me the upper hand. James stood up and started walking down the corridor before leaving he turned back 

'Don't pretend to be there for her, she doesn't need you messing around her life.' With that said he turned the corner only the sound of his fading footsteps could be heard. I knocked on the bathroom door 'Are you okay in there' I heard a muffled cry, even though my heart is breaking at the sound of Charlotte crying.

'Ye-s I'm fi-fi-ne' her voice was quiet but loud enough to hear. The effects this girl has on me are crazy, I want to break down the door and hold her till the worlds a better place. To make her feel love, kindness, family all the things a person needs. If only she would let me in. My thoughts were interrupted as I heard the lock of the door open and out stepped Charlotte. Her eyes all puffy and her face stained with tears 

'Sorry sir I shouldn't be such a cry baby. I'll head to my class now' her voice sounded so dry. As she turned away I realised that as a teacher I meant to give consequences for rule breakers. It was time to step into my teacher role and forget about my personal feelings 

'Ah Miss Scott, because you have technically skipped half of the lesson by hiding in the bathroom you now have after school detention with me' her face remained emotionless as she shrugged 'Okay' and then she was gone. 

She had lost all interest wouldn't care about anything; I became worried that she might try again. Erasing the emotions I was feeling I went to my class to prepare my classes for the rest of the day.

Charlotte's POV

As I heard James and Kyle talking I was confused at why James cared so much. We had never talked before; he probably just pitied me the girl who tried to kill herself and failed. That's when I heard Kyle say my name, only minutes ago he was saying how it hurt him so much when I tried to kill myself but now I hear no emotion in his voice. I knew it was a pity act, it wasn't the first time this had happened. As I heard James leave I stood up and went by the door I heard James say to leave me alone, if only I could thank him but I wasn't going to leave until Kyle was gone. 

Even though I was still crying I had to get out of there looking at my reflection in the mirror I saw the same girl that had appeared all those years ago the night my mother left; the broken girl. Someone knocked on the door 'Are you okay in there' his voice sounded worried but it was probably just my imagination. 

I struggled with my words but formed a sentence 'Ye-s I'm fi-fi-ne' I hope he could hear me as I just wanted him to leave. I heard nothing on the other side of the door so I took my chance that he had left, wiping my tears away I unlocked the door and stepped out of the bathroom. He was still there, looking into his eyes I couldn't see any of the emotions I saw before. It was like he had turned off any kind of emotion from his face 

'Sorry Sir I shouldn't be such a cry baby. I'll head to my class now'. I turned away and started towards my maths class 

'Ah Miss Scott' I turned around to face him 'because you have technically skipped half of the lesson by hiding in the bathroom you now have after school detention with me' I had cried so much I really didn't feel anything anymore so I shrugged 

'Okay' and walked away leaving him standing there. I wasn't going to class I know people would stare even more than they already have today. I grabbed my bag from my locker and walked out to my car. I drove to a place I hadn't been in years; the big tree. 

The Big tree was the place my brother would take me if our father had been drinking, we would spend hours up here doing basically anything. We laughed and talked, played games just spending time with each other. The last time I had been to the tree was the day Jordy left for university. When he left the house I grabbed my things and just sat by the tree. Thinking of these memories my eyes filled with tears but I continued to drive. 

As I arrived at the tree, my memories flooded with Jordy. He was my sunshine in a dark cloud the one who knew me better than anyone else. This was our spot but now there's only me. Grabbing a picnic blanket from my boot I placed it under the tree and sat down among the last of the autumn leaves. I know I may be crazy but somehow being here makes it feel like he's here with me. I decided to speak even if he didn't reply to me

'Hey Jordy, I could really use you right now. I feel like the worlds collapsing on top of me. The day you died, a part of me died too. You were the one who got me through tough times and when you left I gave up on everything. You are my rock Jordy and you were taken too soon. Help me to see the good in people who try to help me, I just can't seem to let anyone in and now I'm the one hurting people. Help me Jordy please' 

I thought my tears had run dry but when I got no reply I knew he had truly gone. It is hard to accept but reality is just what life handed to me. Hugging my body I cocooned into Jordy's hoodie. The scent of his body spray still lingered and I felt like he was hugging me. Those hugs I miss and will never get to feel again, that feeling of love now another of life's mysteries. I stayed there for hours just listening to the birds in the trees and the soft whistle of the breeze. My phone began to buzz, 'Shit' it was Father and it was 8:45pm. I answered the call

Phone call

S- 'WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?'

C- 'I'm coming home now; I was just studying at the library'

S- 'OH REALLY BECAUSE I HAVE SOMEONE HERE WHO TELLS ME DIFFERENTLY'

C- *Gulp 'who?'

S- 'COME HOME and you'll see.'

C- 'But-'

He cut the line. I was in for it now he sounded really mad. Who had told my father I wasn't at school, it took a while before it clicked; Mr Kyle Rivers. I had forgotten about detention with him. Getting back in my car I drove to my awaited fate. Getting home I saw both Father's Car and what I presumed to be Mr Rivers car, locking my car I walked to the front door step before stepping inside I took a deep breath and braced myself for what was about to happen.