To the Ends of the Earth

Chapter 11

*

Lilly

"What do you see?" I asked with a quavering voice.

"The missing part of you."

"What missing part?" I wasn't sure why I asked, I knew what she was referring to. The hole in my chest where Gabriel's presence should be throbbed painfully.

She waved at the air as if shooing a fly. "You told me over the phone yesterday that someone was lost. Someone you love. But it's not that simple, is it? You are both lost. Both unfulfilled. Two halves of a whole that were torn apart before you were complete."

"I'm not lost."

"Aren't you? You, dear girl, are more lost than he is. He knows what he wants and where he will go. He will come for you. It is not a matter of if but when."

"He will?" Hope bloomed in my chest, a hope I hadn't realized I'd been carrying inside of me like a dormant seed. Maybe I had never actually believed any of this could be real. Maybe until this very moment it hadn't been.

"Every breath he takes, he fights fate to find you. Even now he searches for the impossible and will bend the will of the very universe in which he stands to see his desires realized. He's refreshingly rebellious." She rubbed her cranberry colored lips with the tip of one long nail, a small and satisfied smile tipping up the corners.

"How could you possibly know that?"

"I see many things young one, and I pay attention when most do not. Besides which, your thoughts are like a beacon. You take no care to hide them and I can sense how desperate you are. Strong emotions have their own language, and you've had some very strong emotions of late. You would do well to shield them."

"But how?"

The corners of her lips turned up even higher. "Practice."

Before I could ask her exactly how I was supposed to practice hiding my thoughts and emotions, she continued. "Do you believe you have a soul, Lilly?"

I furrowed my brow, distracted. "Of course I have a soul."

She blew air from between her lips. It made a "psh" sound. "Don't just tell me what you think I want to hear. Really listen. Look within yourself. Do you believe there is a piece of you that is eternal? Do you believe that there is some spark, some essence that fuels you and guides you, something that defines you and you alone?"

This time I didn't answer right away. I had never really thought about it before outside of halfhearted Sunday's at church. I didn't have much of an opinion on the subject. I had always been more concerned with this life and how to navigate it.

"I don't know." I whispered.

Her eyes shone with fevered light and she matched my hushed tone. "Would you like to?"

I didn't know what she meant. My survival instinct flared to life once more and I wasn't sure if it was in warning or excitement. I stayed quiet and watched her instead, feeling like a mouse that's come face to face with a hungry cat. It occurred to me that cats often liked to play with their food before they feasted.

When I didn't answer, she continued. "Would you like to know what I do here, little Lilly? Because I can show you. I can show you many things." She picked up one of the tightly wound balls of golden wire, rolling it around between her hands as she spoke.

"And why would you want to show me?" I asked with unease. "More importantly, what will it cost me? I don't have much money."

"Smart girl." She smiled her deadly smile. "But look around you, child. Does it seem that I am in need of mortal coin?"