Corvus (Stars and Sails, Book 1)

Fifty-two (Part 2 of 2)

Dr. Nejem placed a glass in front of Amelia Rose on the desk. It was filled with a rusty orange liquid. Amelia Rose wanted to ask what it was for, but she had resolved to not talk to the doctor. After he set her dislocated arm, she didn't even thank him.

She ignored the glass and glanced over to the cots. Holden was studying her from his cot. She hated to spend time with him. It seemed like he was always thinking about something. He could never have a real moment of mindlessness. There was always something going on behind his eyes. She loathed imagining all of the dreadful things he must be thinking.

Dr. Nejem picked up the glass of the table and held it towards her. "Please drink this for the pain you are experiencing," he said.

She took the glass from him and sank the mixture down. It had all the bland undertones of water with a lingering bitterness and earthiness. If it wasn't so spicy, Amelia Rose would've suspected that she was drinking dirt. She coughed and wiped at her mouth with her wrist. Holden tapped his foot in frustration, presumably at her manners.

She wanted to ask what she had just drunk, but she didn't want to talk to Dr. Nejem. She waited, looking at the floor.

"How are your legs?" Dr. Nejem asked, directing his attention to Holden.

"Sore. I slept it off."

Dr. Nejem laughed. "You cannot actually sleep off an--"

"I slept it off." Holden cleared his throat. "I'd like to speak to Mrs. Holden," he said.

"Of course. I will be on my way. I have other patients." He packed up his medical kit and paused to look at Mr. Holden. He slowed down. "Do you want me to stay?" he whispered to Amelia Rose. He obviously didn't trust Holden. No one did. It must have been the permanent scowl affixed to his face.

"He is a terrible bit callous," Amelia Rose said, glancing at the floor. "But I trust him more than I trust you."

"Oh," Dr. Nejem nodded. He walked to the door. "I was not the one who changed my appearance to get a job." Before she could respond, he left. She stayed in the desk chair, her hands fidgeting with aggravation. A few moments of silence passed. Now with Dr. Nejem gone, Amelia Rose wished for someone to be a buffer. Maybe Suzaku would finish his shift early and come back to the cabin.

"Do you still have feelings for Payne?" Holden leaned forward, his back hunched on the bottom bunk to avoid hitting his head on the cot above it.

Amelia Rose was surprised by the directness of his question. It had almost occurred to him that he shouldn't care since neither of them put effort into their relationship. "No, I don't think..." she sighed. "I do not. Things are changing so much. I need time to find myself. I'm not being unfaithful to you."

"Do you think I care?" he asked. "I've made a lot of mistakes, Mrs. Holden—"

"Don't you call me that dreadful name again!" She stood up, wincing at the way she moved her arm. "I'm not yours. I'm mine. No one owns me but me. I'm Amelia Rose and if you would just—"

"Listen, Amelia Rose," he interrupted her. She wrapped her arm around her waist and pressed her back against the wall, prompting him to go on with her silence. "You want to know something?"

"About you?" Her lip curled back.

"Yes, about me. You're so goddamn annoying. Really boils my blood." He took a deep breath and focused on the cot, running his hand across the sheets to smooth it out."I never wanted to marry you."

"Thanks for rubbing it in, Mr. Holden, really," She gritted her teeth and looked away, scowling.

"Listen, just listen. I never was going to love you or any wife, I'm just accepting it."