*Lance POV*
Dontcha know the way in every rom-com there's that gay best friend?
Well, in Pidge's case, that was me.
We sit in my bedroom, and Pidge patiently waits as I paint her nails green,
"Soooo~ any progress with the Shiro business?" I grin, winking at Pidge. She goes red,
"W-what? No..." she frowns.
I sigh,
"Pidge, you gotta get yourself out there. Confess!" I states,
"I know confessing comes easy to you, but not everyone has your confident and boastful personality!" Pidge snaps.
I just sigh again,
"Pidge, c'mon. It's obvious he likes you. And if he breaks your heart, I'll just have to chop his dick off. Simple." I smile. Pidge rolls her eyes playfully and smirks,
"Yeah, after staring at it for like five years." She teases,
"Oh please. I've already got Keith's dick to stare at, why would I want Shiro's? That's your job, after all." I snicker.
Pidge playfully punches my arm,
"Whatever." She grins. I put the nail-varnish away and look at her,
"I'm serious though. I really think he likes you back." I smile. Pidge looks at the ground,
"You really think so? You aren't just saying that cause you're my best friend?" She asks,
"I swear on my dick, and if I'm lying, I give you permission to chop it off." I joke.
Pidge laughs,
"What is it with you and chopping dicks off tonight?" She snickers,
"Don't know." I smirk. We laugh and chat for another few hours before it's time Pidge leaves.
Once I wave her goodbye I race inside and grab my phone. I get up Shiro's number and start texting.
Lance:
Hey Shiro listen! If you hurt my Pidge, your dick will get cut off.
Shiro:
...I have no idea what you're talking about but I feel a breach of privacy...
Lance:
Good. Now go give her a kiss before I kick your balls so hard you won't be able to have kids.
Shiro:
..........Lance you know how much I want kids...........
Lance:
Exactly. So I don't doubt you'll do it.
Shiro:
.......you have got to stop threatening me like this.
Lance:
Boi move your ass before I kick you where the sun don't shine.
Shiro:
I don't even know where she is!!
Lance:
G'night Shiro. Sweet dreams~
~Time skip~
Shiro:
.....Lance is that you standing outside my house....?
Shiro:
Are you holding scissors!?
Shiro:
LANCE I'LL CALL THE FUCKING COPS!! I NEED MY TESTICLES!!
YOU ARE READING
Shidge One-Shots
RomanceREQUESTS ARE OPEN!! Alright guys, first off, I was really bored and put a bunch of random voltron ship names in a hat and chose a random one that happened to be Shidge. They aren't the worst ship in voltron, I mean if Shiro wasn't gay and kinda acte...
