Call Me Ashleigh

Chapter 27:

CHAPTER 27:

White.

All I saw was white.

I panicked for a moment, before my vision cleared and my room materialized before my eyes.

Oh. Perhaps all that had just been a dream.

I turned my head to look out the window. It was bright outside, but I couldn't tell what time it was. The clock hanging over the door was a blur of white and specks of black, it provided no answers.

When did I fall asleep? Which parts of my memories were real and which was a dream?

As stupid as it seemed to hope like this, I wished August 20th, the April letter, the March tension, everything bad between us, had all been part of that crazy dream. I wished that when I got out of bed, I'd realise that everything was good, and back to my blissful paradise.

A glossy poster of a chestnut horse prancing in a field full of flowers caught my attention. I scowled. I'd put the thing up, last week, after my overenthusiastic parents got it for me despite my protests. Apparently I'd been 'moody', and needed cheering up.

"Ah, a horse!" my mother had exclaimed when we walked by the thrift store. "Your favourite, Freda! Just the thing to cheer you up!"

"It's not, uh, I don't like this colour!"

"Nonsense! It's exactly the same colour as... what was that horse you liked? Wander?"

"Wonder, mom." I sighed.

"Ah yes, Wonder. Why don't you like this, it's that same coppery colour!"

How I could I say that I wanted nothing to do with my childhood obsession, how could I explain that horses left haunting memories of teasing and tears?

How could I say that horses were a pretence, something I used as my identity, because I didn't even have one? How could I say that I never was crazy about anything? My parents wouldn't understand. They thought I loved horses. In truth, I only loved the security it gave me, the feeling that I was someone, who actually liked something.

That I was someone normal.

The poster was purchased, and pasted on my wall. I could see it perfectly from my position on the bed. Well, the angle was perfect, but the graceful animal was nothing but a large splotch of copper and swirls of green and yellow.

Stupid poster. Trust a dumb thing like that to yank me back down to earth. It had all happened, August 20th, everything!

I couldn't change it, it was done.

Leaping out of bed, I staggered towards the door. I was still a little dizzy, and my head was heavy, pulling me in all directions.

"Ashleigh!" a familiar voice called excitedly. "Mr and Mrs Friesian, she's awake!"

Sheryl. Oh gosh, Sheryl.

'Please let her tell me all the nonsense with Mr Muk never happened, please...' I begged silently. 'At least let that bit be a dream...'

"Ashleigh!" Sheryl cried, bursting into my room. "Mr Muk's here!"

Oh. My. Poof.

~~~~~~~~~~

So Mr Muk apologised for 'endangering' me, and overreacting, but lectured me for not telling him (well I tried), not to mention talking in class and forgetting my textbook. I accepted his apology, but noted the glares. It was a well-known fact that Muk hated me ever since the day I couldn't find a group for a project, went around hopelessly begging, and at last, a day after the deadline, finally mustered the courage to go and ask for his help. Unfortunately, the only help I got was a two-hour long screaming-and-saliva-spraying show, starring none other than Mr Muk himself. And later, a failing grade.

Of course, while it was my fault, he did somewhat overreact. As usual. He's probably stressed out of his mind, especially with students like me, so you can't really blame him for getting mad easily. I would too, if I had to teach myself.

He liked Sheryl though, that was why he picked on me and not her. Sheryl is one of those good little nerds who always pays attention in class and never hands in homework late. She was a natural leader, a prefect, but not overly domineering or bossy. She was like a mother to me, always caring. Actually, I was moved to sit next to Sheryl, because the teachers thought she would be a good influence on me. So far, their plan hasn't really worked. I'm still as disorganised, distracted and dumb as ever.

I was glad when Mr Muk left. He seemed too grand and full of pomp for my humble house. He didn't fit. Besides, his face was not the most pleasant sight to behold.

Sheryl stayed, to tidy my room. Actually, to say she tidied my room would be an understatement. In actual fact, she could have been cleaning up the aftermath of an earthquake, there wasn't much of a difference really.

I was glad she stayed.

It was weird, you know, these weird fainting stuffs. I don't know what it is, I can't stand around too long. Perhaps I'm just physically weak, everything tires me out. I can't even walk straight most of the time, I sorta swerve here and there, trip, bump into things, you know... stuff like that.

This is just one of the many reasons I can never be normal. I can't overstrain myself, I can't run, jump, and swim like other children and teenagers. While my peers laugh and play, I have to sit and watch.

My life is weird.

But to tell you the truth, it was actually pretty fun. I love drama. Sometimes, I sit back, relax and enjoy the highly dramatic movie of my life. Every now and then, I walk through the screen, wreak some more havoc, then come back and have some popcorn with it. Sometimes I feel I'm sadistic, horribly so.

Every story needs a little drama, a little pain, a little tragedy. Even if it hurts the author.

Sheryl straightened out the last corner of my soft, fluffy unicorn-print quilt, and stood up, dusting her hands on the back of her T-shirt.

"There, all done!" she declared, admiring her work. "Now don't you mess it up!"

I grinned cheekily at her.

Sheryl let out a massive sigh, looking at me knowingly. "Right, right. I forgot. You're Ashleigh, and - "

I cut her off. "Cleanliness doesn't stand a chance against Ashleigh."

Sheryl nodded, a glimmer of mischief glinting in her eyes.

"Goodbye then," she said, exiting my room. "I'll see you at school tomorrow? Hope you're feeling better!"

I guided her to the main door, and when she was out, locked it behind her.

I slumped against the door, all strength suddenly seeping away from me. My parents watched me with concern filled eyes, waiting to catch me if I fell. But I wasn't going to. I was okay.

I was going to be normal.

~~~~~~~~~~

Hey everyone! Sorry I took so long with this! Been really busy lately... And I had writer's block ugh :(

Anyway! This chapter's dedicated to Shana, for just being awesome :D