furthermore

The Beginning

I thought about it today

I took the pills like I was supposed to

and for hour upon hour

I was okay

and then

something changed

This is just the beginning of the new regimen

Maybe the dropoff was too steep at the end of the day

and my brain didn't know how to cope

I felt the swell of anxiety first,

so I knew it was coming

but I was still caught off guard by the intensity

I visualized it so vividly

that I had to convince myself it wasn't real

I've had ideation before,

but this was a whole other level

Only time will tell

if these antidepressants are really working

or I'm just getting worse

This is only the beginning