Moon Lover: Shawn Mendes ✔️

Pink Roses

"This is the sixth batch of flowers this week" Jacob places the bouquet pink roses on the table. "And what's with the pink roses?"

"They're my favourite" Ayla answers simply. "You didn't forgive him huh?" He asks joining her behind he bar to clean the glasses.

"I told him to leave... I told him all of it, he started apologising and I told him to leave" Ayla says shrugging. "And how do you feel?" Jacob ponders cautiously.

"He hasn't left me alone, he started crying, as if he felt my pain-"

"I asked how you felt" Jacob sighs.

Ayla puts down her wash cloth leaning against the wood counter. "Honestly?" She raises an eyebrow.

"Absolutely, be brutally honest" he nods.

She gulps thinking back; Shawn on his knees in front of her, crying like an idiot.

"It broke my heart seeing him cry" she admits sadly. "Even with what he did, it hurt seeing him like that" and it's true, she hated seeing him like that. She hated seeing anyone she cared about upset.

"And he apologised?" Jacob questions.

"He did but I didn't forgive him" she grabs the rag continuing to clean. "And does he know?" Jacob asks skeptically.

"I told you, I told him everything"

Jacob shakes his head at her. "But you didn't tell him that you loved him? Did you?" Jacob sighs.

She did love him, once upon a time. She didn't lie that night when Shawn was walking away and she whispered it. But the moral in her, her internalised morals made her believe it was wrong to love Shawn when she was so deeply in love with Ace. So yes, apart of her loved Shawn.

"I didn't. He doesn't deserve to know" she excuses. "He's not going to stop sending flowers, your mind won't be at ease until you tell him or talk again. It's not like you to hold a grudge Ayla-"

"I'm leaving" she drops the rag harshly and walks out of the bar and into the daylight.

She lets her feet find their way anywhere they want. As she gets lost in her thoughts, she finds herself in front of the fountain.

"Did you get the flowers?"

Ayla turns with rage. Seeing Shawn right before her, he lifts his sunglasses placing them on his head and he looks down at Ayla with his beautiful hazel eyes. Even his eyes angered her.

She raises her hand, slapping him hard across the cheek.

"What the fuck Ayla!" Shawn winces holding his jaw. "You think sending me flowers will make this all okay?" She spits.

"No but-"

"But what Shawn?" Her small fists push him back. She finally snapped, after bottling everything for a year.

"How dare you?" His fists colliding with his hard chest. He stumbles back a little then remains still as she takes her best shots and he lets her.

"How dare you Shawn?" She cries, banging her hands repeatedly. "What makes this okay? What's with the flower huh? Why are you here? Why?" A loud sob escapes her lips, her assault comes to a halt. "Why shawn?" She mumbles brokenly leaning into his body.

Her body falling into his. Shawn sighs, his arms wrap around her securely and he lets her cry.

"Shh shh" his chin rests on top of her head. "Let's go" He whispers in her ear. "You can shout at me all you want. Hit me all you want. Scream and kick all you want. Just not here" He coos softly.

He knew he wouldn't gain her forgiveness so quickly. He knew he had to earn her trust back and he knew he would have to apologise a million times for whatever she went through to even be remotely okay.

-
"I'm sorry"

Shawn looks back at her confused. He places the espresso in front of her shaking his head. "What for?"

"I assaulted you and I'm sorry, I had no right-"

"Shut up Ayla. You don't need to apologise for your feelings" he tells her. Those were the exact she had said to him when he first confessed his love.

She glances at him briefly before averting her eyes around the hotel room.

Then there was a brief silence. Not awkward at all. It's as if they were both gathering their thoughts and thinking of words to explain their feelings.

She wanted to tell Shawn that she did in fact love him to an extent but she wanted to scream at him for ruining Ace.

He wanted to tell Ayla that she was the only woman he ever thought about but he also wanted to just remain silent and listen to her.

"When I first told Jacob he told me I should try to move on" she speaks up.

"And did you?"

"How could I? I tried so hard but I couldn't" she answers. "Why now Shawn? Why are you here now?" She asks facing him.

Shawn clears his throat. "I've not stopped thinking of you Ayla. Everything I see, somehow I relate it back to you. I can't stand myself for not coming earlier... I know you're hurting, I know it so bad... I know what it's like to be in love with someone who doesn't love you back. I know" he says with a heavy heart.

"Jacob told me I'm waiting for something that will never happen, I'm stupidly waiting for Ace to turn up at my door and to tell me he still loves me but he won't. He never will because he's moved on" Ayla wipes a tear quickly. "And I feel stupid, I feel stuck in a phase and I have no idea how to get out... maybe this was the universe telling me he's not for me" her voice quietens down.

"Let me help you get out" he simply says, getting up to kneel down in front of her.

Ayla looks down at him with a blank, saddened face.  "Why?"

"I love you, I really do. I haven't stopped and I don't think I will. You don't have to forgive me Ayla, just let me help" he pleads.

"How?" She hiccups.

"We'll figure it out along the way" he answers simply. Her eyes flicker to his hand resting on her thigh then back to his hopeful eyes.

"Apart of me did love you Shawn" she admits.

Shawn's eyes go wide then he shuts them in bliss, his head falling to her lap.

"Fuck" he mumbles. Ayla leans her head back sighing out deeply. "Fuck, I'll help you" he mumbles. Her fingers slowly weave through his curls.

They were both so lost, they needed each other more than they knew despite their pasts.