Chapter 2; Raging Dilemmas

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V R I N D A

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V R I N D A

Fear. One of the most successfully susceptible emotions that the human consciousness wielded like a doubled edged sword waiting for its abysmal strike. And for the very intent of fear and its root cause of existence in my spectrum of consciousness was the land that had taken all from me, even before I had been born to it.

"Hastinapur" He said looking directly into my eyes. I could see the worried expression hidden underneath his eyes. It couldn't be. Krishna would never do that to me. There has to be a reason behind this.

"The invitations have already been sent, the royal families will be arriving by the next fortnight." Balram added.

I couldn't believe it. This couldn't be happening. The people, the family which was responsible for the plight and agony of mine, would be treated as hospitable guests. I felt the pang of rage insinuate in my veins. Hastinapur was a condemned land. It was the land of my ancestors yet the land that had endowed my family with misfortune and nothing else.

I could feel the concerned gaze of Krishna upon me even though I wasn't looking at him in the eyes. I knew the look on his face too well. Krishna was a remarkable human being. His shift from a father figure to an administrative authority was efficient. Like his mind had clear cut narratives as to what role he needs to play when and right now all I could see was a profound politician whose decsions were gravely thought and precisely executed.

The assembly was dispersed soon after the announcement was made. I gathered up all the strength inside my body to stand.  I couldn't even breathe but I didn't want to create a scene in front of everyone so I did what everybody around me was doing, I walked.

I heard Abhimanyu's voice from behind. It was loud and clear. I chose to ignore it. I did not need words of encouragement or motivation right now. All I needed was silence. I needed time to process the shocking piece of information that had been presented before me. I headed outside the courtroom, to see Sanchi waiting for me. I had to go visit the holy temple of Somnath today.

It was something that I did on every Purnima. It was a ritual started by my mother, when I was little and we were together. After the exile, I did not want to break this serene tradition. It reminded me of her and her gentle nature at one point of time.

I knew that the temple would be a great temporary escape from the problematic present. So I obliged. I nodded towards Sanchi indicating my approval. She nodded in response, and quickly sent for my mare, Teevrata. A gift from my godfather was she, the fastest mare in all of Dwarka.

Soon my mare arrived and I climbed. Sanchi followed my pursuit. I put an end to our stationary position and moved towards the direction of the temple. I maintained my silence throughout the short journey. My thoughts trying to find any positive element in the happenings of today.

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