oxygen (e.d.)

chapter thirty-two

<ethan>

"rowen?" i knock on the porta potty door.

i hear noises, but no one answers.

"rowen i saw you go in there. you good?"

yet again, no one answers and i become worried.

"rowen," i say louder, "i'm coming in."

i push open the door, and run into something hard and sturdy.

"ethan-"

i don't hear the rest of rowen's words, because it's too late.

i see a guy.

on top of her.

kissing her.

anger flares inside me and i have to turn away and grip my hair.

i let out a frustrated cry and try to breathe.

i should've known.

i really, really should've known.

"baby-" she whimpers, pulling on my shirt sleeve.

"don't baby me," i spit, pulling my arm back, "i knew it. i knew you were being shady, rowen."

"ethan i can explain."

"there's nothing to explain. this," i motion to us, "is dysfunctional and it's over. i'm done. i don't deserve to be treated like this."

"we can work it out-" she whines.

"no we can't," i yell, "i'm done. you don't ever appreciate me and i'm pretty sure you were just using me for sex. i'm over it."

before she can say anything else, i stomp away, wanting to shake the anger.

i find myself walking roughly down the beach, kicking sand.

i look out at the water, how it's slowly turning a dark blue from the sunset.

what did i do wrong?

both times?

i'm just not qualified for relationships.

"don't fall."

i look down and see a big hole in the sand in front of me. i was too focused on the sun to notice.

i turn and see riley, sitting in the sand.

her face is lit up with a golden hue, casting a halo around her head.

"why're you here?" i ask sadly.

she shrugs and pats the spot next to her.

i hesitantly sit down.

"where's rowen?" she asks lazily.

"cheating on me," i scoff, anger flushing back in.

"i knew it."

"f*ck you," i say, but with no force behind it.

"please do," she mumbles and sticks her toes in the sand.

i cock my head, "how much did you drink?"

"too much."