Whole

Chapter 13

Katsuko's POV

My eyes slowly opened, and my arm stretched out, expecting to find Masato in the space beside me. However; my arm found nothing but space, which caused me to jolt up in panic and confusion.

"Masato?" I called. When no reply came, panic began to grip at me.

I turned my head to the clock, which told me that it was barely nine in the morning. My eyes then noticed his keys and phone were gone from the bedside table where he'd placed them last night before he took off his jeans. Which, too, were gone.

I buried my face in my hands as I felt tears brimming and my chest tightened. He left without saying goodbye. Did he regret last night? Had last night been bad for him? Had he rethought about me and our relationship?

The insecurities I'd tried so hard to put behind me came creeping over me like a tsunami big enough to destroy a small town advancing at a rapid pace.

I wasn't good enough, the way I was never good enough for my ex. He'd had time to think, and he decided he didn't want me anymore. It was awful, and he didn't want to be with me anymore. The three words he spoke weren't real after all. He lied to me the same way my ex had lied to me. I fell for the act all over again, and I felt my heart shatter as the tears slipped.

I curled myself into a ball under the duvet and let them fall trying to think of what I'd done so wrong for him to leave like that.

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"Kat? Kat! What's wrong? Why are you crying?" The sound of Masato's voice caused me to jump as he stood there, holding a bag and a container with two take away cups.

"You're here." I sat myself up slowly, rubbing the water from my eyes.

"Of course I am, I left you a note, what's wrong?" He placed the bag down on the floor and the container on the bedside as he sat himself down and pulled me into his arms.

"I thought you left me." I sobbed, wrapping my arms around him tight.

"Why on earth do you think I would do that? I left you a note, baby. I put it next to your phone because I know you always check it as soon as you wake up."

I suddenly felt like a fool, wholly embarrassed by the fact I'd assumed the worst of him and let my insecurities take over. I hadn't even thought to check my phone in the panic I'd felt.

"I didn't see it. I thought you'd gone."

"Hey, baby, look at me." Masato took hold of my shoulders and pushed me back a little. One of his hands moved, curling a finger and using it to cup my chin, "If I was going to leave you, I'd never up and leave, not like that. But, I wouldn't do that, never, I meant it when I said I love you, Kat. I woke up this morning still in disbelief that last night happened and that you were mine."

"Where did you go?"

"I woke early, and you were still asleep, so I went out to fetch you a cup of tea and some breakfast. And I got this on the way as well." He moved and leaned down to pick up the small bag from the floor and handed it to me. "I saw your face light up when I pointed it out to you in the shop. So, I went out and got it for you."

I carefully pulled a box from the bag, and my mouth dropped. It was the Itachi Nendoroid I'd wanted for ages but couldn't afford after spending my money on the move and getting set up here. I also couldn't justify the amount it cost even if I could afford it.

I placed the box down on my pillow and lept into his arms, wrapping them around him tightly.

"I'm such an idiot, I'm sorry." I sniffed as I buried my head into the crook of his neck.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Koneko, I should've been a bit smarter about where I left the note. I didn't mean to scare you like that. I wouldn't leave, especially after last night."

I pulled my head from his shoulder, looking at him as I chewed on the inside of my mouth. "So, it was good for you?"

Masato looked at me with furrowed brows, "Of course, it was so much more than good. It was perfect; why would you think I felt differently? Talk to me, baby."

I took a deep breath and lowered my head, "I don't know, it's stupid, I was being stupid, I'm sorry. Don't worry about it."

"Kat, will you stop apologizing? And please, don't ever call yourself stupid. And I'm going to worry because there's a reason you thought I'd up and left, and I thought last night was less than amazing. Please, Kat, if we're going to have any chance in this, especially when I go back on tour, I need you to talk to me."

I wanted to tell him. I'd tried to tell him a hundred times before now, about the real reason I'd taken the job here. However, every time I tried, my heart began to pound against my chest. My palms grew sweaty, and panic bubbled inside me. I'd barely spoken to Ryo about what had happened, but I knew Masato was right.

He loved me, and I loved him, we had no chance of surviving through the inevitable trials we'd face in time if we couldn't talk to each other. He deserved to know about my past, and I couldn't hide it from him forever. If I didn't tell him now, events like this morning would keep happening. My insecurities would keep taking over and would put our relationship in murky waters.

"There was another reason I decided to take the job and move here," I spoke through a shaky breath. "After what happened, I couldn't stay there anymore."

"What happened, baby?"

"My ex...he..." I sucked in a huge breath, trying to will the words that burned like acid from my lips, "He tried to kill me."