Whole

Chapter 24

Masato's POV

"Hey, Yoko, can I borrow you?" I asked as I poked my head into the dressing room of the venue we were playing in tonight.

"Sure." He nodded, standing up and following me out. "What's up?"

"I wrote out some lyrics and rough music, but I need your piano skills. I can play, but not as good as you." I chuckled.

For the past few weeks, I'd been staring at my laptop screen, trying to find the words, the tune, the notes, the chords to do justice to how I felt. It was a song I wanted to write for Kat. She needed to know how I feel, but every time I tried to speak, words failed me, or she dodged the bullet. A song was the best way I could think of expressing how I felt with our situation. Where speech would fail, music talked for me, so I'd spent weeks trying to get the music to do the talking.

"All right, show me what you got."

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"Okay, so I know this is for Kat, but we need this on the next album." Yoko grinned after we'd spent the past two hours hammering out the details to get the song perfect. "And I think with the last section; if we have the others join in, it will be perfect."

"I'll let her decide if she's happy for it to be on the album, but yeah, I was planning on getting the rest in on it as well. I was thinking, maybe the day after we got back or something, I could take her to the studio, and we could play it for her."

"That works for me. It gives us a few days to get the rest of the parts figured out. When is Kat joining us again?"

"Tomorrow, we decided she should spend an extra day with her family. I got to meet her at Seattle-Tacoma at ten in the morning, and then I'm taking her to meet my brother. We should be with you guys by about four-ish for sound checks and all."

"And then we party, celebrate your birthday and then we go home. And for what it's worth? I think you and Kat have handled this far better than you think you have. We all believe you two can make it; you just have to keep doing what you have been. All those small efforts, like how you had flowers sent to her as a surprise, those quick two minute calls, flying her out every chance, or popping home yourself even if it's only for a night. Sure, kills the bank account, but hey, there's always more money to be made."

I sighed as I nodded, "Yeah, I guess the worst part of it is knowing what she's already been through and knowing she's hurting. I don't want her to hurt, Yoko, she doesn't deserve it."

"Dude, you're looking at it the wrong way entirely. Okay, yes, she's hurting, so are you, but you're not hurting her like you seem to think. Your hurt is for all the right reasons. You're not hurting her the way her ex did. You're both hurting because you love each other so damn much just an hour away from the other pains you. You both knew the deal, but you got to stop getting so wrapped up in the short term. Want to know how I think you should look at it?"

One thing I loved about Yoko, is he was wise beyond compare. He had a way of looking at things that none of us could. He was like that wise old father who could put everything into perspective. "Go for it."

"Right now, you're together, and you're happy despite the situation. Kat is taking off in her job, and you in yours, but you're finding ways to hold together. You're walking your separate paths, side by side, but making sure your eyes don't leave each other. And, one day, when the time is right, your tracks will merge. You'd have built this amazing foundation for you to walk that path together and be ready to live life, just you two and whatever children you decide to have. You'd have lived this dream to the fullest, and she'd have lived hers, no risk of resentment, or regrets. It hurts now, and it's tough, but when we're standing there, at your wedding, being awesome uncles to your kids, you'll know it was worth every second of hardship."

I let Yoko's words sink in for a moment as I played them in my head, and I knew he was right. I already knew I was living this life for her now, for our future. However, I'd been so wrapped up in the hurt we both felt right now I'd not thought of it the way Yoko had put it.

It only made me surer of the fact I needed to play this song for Katsuko once we were home and of the next move I'd planned to make. I just had to pray; she felt the same way as I did.

"Thanks, Yoko. You're right before I was doing this for me. But now, it's for her, for our future, I just have to keep reminding myself of that. I guess the past three months, I've lost sight of that a little."

Yoko patted his hand on my shoulder and gave me a small smile, "Don't worry, as long as we're around, we won't let you lose sight of it. We all love, Kat, and we love you two together. We've never seen you so happy, so we'll support you in every way we can."

"Thanks, dude, you seriously don't know how much that means." My smile widened as I felt myself relax. I felt like the luckiest guy in the world to have them as friends and bandmates, with Kat as a girlfriend and the family I had between Seattle and home in Nagoya.

Kat and I would make it. We'd have that future. I just had to be patient and keep my eyes focused on the long term.