Accept Me

16: "When..."

We avoid the talk for a few days, well, Tristan more so than myself. I try initiating the conversation a few times, but he simply states that I need more rest and that I should avoid any stressful situations. I want to grab him and shake him until he finally listens to me, but my weakened state barely allows me to use the bathroom by myself.

After about a week, though, I've finally convinced Tristan to sit with me and hear me out. That's why he's sitting across from me, a scowl on his face with his arms crossed at his chest, though I can detect the worry he's trying to keep from me. The tension is palpable, and I know this is a serious turning point in our young relationship. Even though I'm the one to initiate this, I have no idea how to start, so we sit in uncomfortable silence for a few, heavy minutes.

"When..." I cough awkwardly as the word slips out. I let out a long sigh before I shake off my nervousness and begin again. 

"When I was younger, I had everything that a child could ask for. I had the best and most loving parents who devoted their lives to making me happy. I had a lot of friends, but my best friend was one of the most important people in my life. He could make me laugh at any time, he gave the best hugs, he was so sweet to everyone around him.

I met him in school, one of the kids was getting bullied for looking different 'cause he had down syndrome. He didn't beat those kids up like someone else might've. Nope, instead he decided to educate them on why the kid looked different and why it wasn't nice to make fun of someone else simply because of the way they looked. He got beat up. But he didn't let those bullies put a hand on the kid after that.

I looked up to him, even though he was younger than me, and started following him everywhere. He let me, and we were inseparable since then; that's the best thing that's ever happened to me. We did everything together, wherever he was I was sure to be right next to him and vice versa." 

I don't look at him as I let myself dwell in the memories, both the good and painful ones, my words flowing nonstop.

~~~

"When I was nine"

I let my head fall back as I swung up in the air, my feet touching the sky for a second before I swung back down. I giggled as I did it again and again, my head getting dizzy as the blood rushed to my brain. My long hair touched the grass and became muddy, but I ignored it as I kept swinging until Momma told me to stop before I fainted. I pouted as I slowed down and felt all the blood leave my head, making me giggle as everything started to spin. 

"I told you to stop that." 

"Sorry Momma." I said, pouting up at her with crossed eyes.

"You look silly." She said, chuckling at my face, making me smile widely at her. "Come on, time for learning, silly." Momma said, picking me up and carrying me home.

Momma said that since I was getting older, my wolf would start to present itself. That meant the adults had to keep an eye on me in case something went wrong and I got hurt. 

"Today we're talking about how your wolf will affect you." Poppa said, waiting until I nodded at him before he kept talking. "Wolves rely on instinct alone, they don't worry about morals since their only goal is survival. So there will be times when you feel like you have to do something based purely on your emotions. As a human, you sometimes need to stop and think before you do something, because your emotions will get the best of you. Got it?"

"Yup."

"Good. You're a female, therefore your wolf will act as a natural female wolf would. We have Beta blood, so you'll most likely fall into a Beta position."