Secrets ↠ Peter Parker

21

NOTICE: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS CONTENT FROM SENSELESS - PETER PARKER. IF YOU WANT MORE EXPLANATION TO THE 'FINAL DAY', READ CHAPTER 35 OF THE PREVIOUS BOOK.

(Y/N POV)

The way the sunlight plays upon your hair.

"It's done."

I tossed down my screw driver, and let out an exasperated sigh. The clock read 3:56, the sun already glinting off the windows. I groaned, propping myself back up onto my feet, and lifted my arms above my head to stretch out my weary muscles.

"Ethan," I yawned, "tell Happy I'm leaving in two hours."

"Wouldn't you like to get rest before your trip? I'd advise it highly."

"Nah. Avenging started in 2012, and I'm willing to keep that record."

"But who will you avenge?"

"Nat, Steve, Vision, other Loki," I said, before sighing, "my dad."

"Miss Stark, you will not be able to save them in this world. Whatever you do there, will not change what has already happened here."

"That's not the point. I know I exist somewhere in that dimension, and if I don't help, that version of me will lose maybe even more than I did."

"Very well then. Happy Hogan will arrive in 15 minutes."

"Thank you," I said, before heading off to my room.

As I walked down the hallway, everything seemed different. Strange, and not in a good way. A soft echo seemed to pass through the walls, and my skin tensed up at the cold air.

Are you ready?

I stopped walking. The last time I heard a voice in my head, was a while ago. The day that Peter died. Something about what it said seemed familiar, and I felt my heartbeat quicken nervously. Except, the voice wasn't in my head anymore.

It was coming from Peter's room.

I'll come back, I promise.

Why was it so familiar?

I took a slow step towards the closed door, scared to even touch the handle. Peter had never seen this room; he never came back with me. I don't remember what it looked like, mostly.

You won't even notice I'm gone.

Now I remembered.

What I was hearing was the memory of the final day. The day my dad and Peter left. I remembered it so vividly now. My arms wrapped around Peter, trying not to cry as I heard him speak for what I thought would be the last time.

"But what if you don't?" I whispered, knowing what he would say next.

I wouldn't ever leave you.

But he did leave me.

And I left him.

It's going to be okay.

I reached out for the doorknob.

Don't worry.

I heard the click of it unlocking.

I promise.

I promise.

I promise.

I pushed open the door, the cold air rushing in at me. The room was untouched, everything exactly as I left it. Red walls, tool bench, a view of the skyline. I wanted him to see this room. To love this room. But he doesn't even know it exists.

And he doesn't even care.

"You promised," I spat out, turning and running down the hallway. I kept running until I got to my room, and I slammed the door behind me. I was angry now, my chest pounding with confusion and madness, "I hate you Peter Parker."

I love you.

"No you don't!"

I love you.

"Shut up!"

I love you.

I slammed my fist on the wall, feeling the pain travel up my arm.

3001.

"STOP," I yelled, shutting my eyes.

I am in control of my emotions.

I have been, and I will be.

I hate you Peter Parker, and I won't let your memory pull me back.

"Ethan," I growled, "Tell everyone I'm leaving now."

"Miss Stark-"

"You take orders from me, so do what I say. I'm leaving with or without them."

"Of course. I will inform them immediately."

********

"Do you need me to explain what the quantum realm is?"

Loki shook his head, and stepped onto the platform, "I've already read about it."

"Good. Happy, start it up."

The man looked at me uneasily, before switching on the controls.

"Don't you want to test run it?" Happy asked, "we don't know if it's safe."

"We don't have time."

"Y/N-"

"Let's go."

I shoved the helmet over my head, and closed my eyes. I knew the two of them were confused at my sudden annoyance, but I didn't want to explain it to them.

"Initializing departure in 3," Happy called out.

"See you on the other side," I whispered to loki.

"2."

"Other side, Stark," he said back.

I took a deep breath, and crossed my fingers. A hundred thoughts were flying through my mind, but I could only think about one.

About him.

I hate you Peter Parker.

But did I?

One.