Lonely together (Leo Valdez fan-fiction)

Comfort

Nora POV

I bolted up from my bed covered in cold sweat and tear stains on my cheeks. My heart was beating really fast and I was shocked by the amount of pain one person could go through at such an age.
It was still dark out and I obviously couldn't go back to sleep after that. So I got up and looked everywhere for him. He wasn't in his bedroom or the engine room or the dining room. The last place he could be was on the top deck. Walking up the stairs I notice a tall figure standing next to Festus. It may still be dark but I could tell who it was instantly. It was Leo Valdez just the guy I've been looking for.
As soon as I saw him I ran to him to gave him the biggest hug ,from behind, I could ever give to show him how sorry I was and to give him comfort. He was so warm and cozy, I always wonder how he keeps a happy face to hide his pain. I mean I understand but sometimes I can't keep it up for long when I smile and make jokes to hide that I'm not ok.
Leo tensed, surprised by my action but I still kept holding onto him tightly not wanting to let go.
Leo could tell that I wasn't going to move so he tried his best to turn around to get a better look at me.
'Hey Nora what's wrong?' He said quietly and slowly. It made me calm down a little to see him but as soon as I looked into his eyes I cried really hard into his chest and I couldn't stop the tears. I have never cried so much especially not in front of someone I know. His eyes were enough to show me how broken he was. The sight of that just squeezed at my heart.
Leo tried calming me down saying comforting words in my ear while his head laid on mine. He pulled away slowly and I loosened my grip on him.
He looked into my eyes but I looked away not wanting to see the hurt in his eyes again. It was too much to bare.
Still looking away I tried to calm down my sobs and explain my sudden action. 'L-Leo I-I-I saw y-yo-your pa-past'. That was as much as I could muster to him. I couldn't tell how he felt. If he saw my past I would feel bad for making him see something that I hid from everyone. But I shook out of my thoughts while he put his fingers under my chin and motioned for me to look up into his eyes. The eyes that hold so much history of pain and hurt that he's hidden from everyone, even himself.
I dared myself to not look up but his soft touch made me obey his request, to look into his eyes. His gaze, on the other hand, made me freeze on the spot. I was paralysed and lost into his soft brown chocolate eyes. I could still see the pain he suffered, it took me back to when I saw a young Leo crying and feeling alone in the world. He felt like it was his fault. It was worse than I thought when he explained it to me the other day. I also saw the true Leo with his mask down. I saw how lonely he feels now even though he's surrounded by friends but is only seen as a seventh wheel.
'I saw yours too' My breath got caught. He saw my past too. A past that I try to forget but can't. A past that I handle alone and keep away from everyone. I felt ashamed right now for when I used to feel sad about myself when Leo has been through so much worse and he's not the only one. But then again I'm just a selfish human being.
Still unable to trust myself with words, Leo decided to explain what he saw and what Aphrodite said to him. He saw every weak moment I had, every breakdown, every self doubt I had, every painful comment and lectures that were thrown at me and worst of all he's seen the death of my young brother that no one knows about except my family. He saw every single experience I went through that effected me. It scared me. It scared me how he saw the weak me and all the painful memories that I try to bury. They have all now resurfaced and replayed fresh in my mind. But that was nothing compared to Leo. I have no idea how he feels towards me experiencing everything he experienced throughout his life until now.
When he finished I tried as hard as I could to remain calm throughout my explanation but it was hard. Seeing his sad expression while I explained the memories of his that I saw. It was like a wound has just reopened. I felt horrible for explaining his suffering to him. It was hard to stay calm, what I saw tore my heart to pieces. I finished off by telling him about how Aphrodite had said the exact same thing that he explained.
But once my thoughts were no longer clouded, I wondered about why she chose me to share Leo's memories. And why he shared mine. It didn't make sense and why would Aphrodite care about our past. And how is it linked? I had so many questions that have no answers. I was so lost in my own thoughts until Leo brought me back.

'I'm sorry Nora. I hate to see you like this. I didn't want to let you see my past so you could relive the pain I went through. It's all my fault. I shouldn't be burdening you with my past.' Leo felt really guilty and angry at himself. He hated himself for something that wasn't in his control and I hated to see him like that.

'Hey, hey, hey. It's not your fault, stop blaming everything on yourself. This was out of your control Leo. If anything, I'm burdening you more since you're holding so much more pain than I am, and all my fears and breakdowns seem ridiculous and selfish. Guess she was right I am selfish' I say while staring out into the ocean in the dark with the moon shining our way. If only I could have that light to guide me out of the darkness. Ugh, look at me, I'm still feeling sorry for myself. I'm so so selfish and careless towards other people and I only think about myself.

Leo stood next to me against the railing staring out to sea. He spoke to me but still facing the sea still trying to process what had just happened and soaking it all in.
' Nora' he said softly so only I could hear.
' I've only known you for about 3 days, yet I think your the most amazing girl ever who has saved me twice. You shouldn't let other people's words effect you so much and affect your actions and thoughts, they obviously haven't bothered to know you. You are not selfish, you are anything but that. Just remember that. I hope you can trust me with your problems like I trust you.' He said firmly so that I understood. I turned to face him only to find him already staring at me. I just stood there looking deep into his warm, brown welcoming eyes, and was dumbfounded by what he just said to me. I wasn't used to someone telling me how amazing I was, it was the first time anyone has done that. Looking into his eyes told me that he meant every word.

My heart was beating really fast as his face is so close to mine that I could feel his warm breath on my face and how his eyes were intensely reading mine. I realised in that moment that we shared a special type of connection that could never be broken.
'It would take some getting used to because I've never been able to trust anyone or even express my feelings to people. Trust to me is a big thing and I've never given it to anyone not even my own family. I don't rely on people so I would be able to avoid any disappointment and heartbreak when my trust is broken. So it wouldn't hurt as much if any of my friends forgot me, abandoned me, treated me as if I'm invisible or even talked bad about me behind me back. So I've never showed my true self, instead I hid behind a fake smile and showed everyone I'm fine. No one knows how my life really is and all the troubles and struggles I've been through. Trust needs to be earned and not just given. So you should value the trust I'm giving you right now because your the first person to actually gain it'
'Was that a threat' Leo said dramatically with a hand over his heart in mock hurt.
'What do you think?' I smirked at my comment and felt proud to show someone that I can be strong and in control.
I was still gazing into his eyes that seemed to tell me how grateful he really is for my trust. Butterflies started forming in my stomach and my heart beat rose by the way his eyes studied me and gave me a sense of safety and security.
When I finally broke out of my gaze remembering that he had someone special that he needed to go save after the war. I can't start to form a crush again, not when he's already in love with someone else. Nothing can ever happen because 1) he loves calypso and is doing everything in his power to get her back and 2) no one can like someone like me anyway.

No one ever has and no one ever will. I don't blame them. But I can't take him away from calypso, it would be like my parents divorce all over again and I would feel horrible if I was the reason they broke up.
After my remark I saw Leo's face sadden again and I wanted to take that frown away it at least show him I'm there for him to cheer him up and try to distract him from his intoxicating thoughts.
'At least, look at the bright side of this situation..' I said to try and cheer him up so he wouldn't be able to have time to blame himself.

'And what would that be' he scoffs. He looks at me curiously with his big, warm, brown, eyes.... stop day dreaming and looking like a fool Nora and answer the question.

'That were now closer than ever and we can understand each other better. Plus now your going to have someone there for you to cheer you up and annoy you to death since I wouldn't fall for any of your fake smiles and jokes that hide your pain.'
'Guess your stuck with this bad boy' He said smirking. Oh, how much I love that smirk.
'We need to do something to keep us off this depressing topic. We don't want to lose our cool in front of our friends' I said so I could get back to my cheery self and forget about all the pain that we just saw and talked about.

'I've got an idea, follow me' Leo said and I followed him to wherever he was taking me to take our minds off the subject.