𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐃

10: does he make you happy?

Elle's PoV:

I wake up hating my life often. But only once in a year I really die in the mornings.

My little brother's birthday.

He hasn't celebrated his birthday with us for three years now. I'm a person who lets go of depressive spirit taking you down easily but my brother is the only one who affects my feelings every time.

No matter how much time passes, the pain is here. With me. And isn't going to leave.

Swallowing the knot in my throat down, oppressing my crying. Maybe I should cry now so I won't when I'm going over to my parents' home?

My dad is the worst of all, he still buys a birthday cake without lighting the candle because my brother is not here to blow them off. We meet every birthday, get him presents and leave them in his room so one day when he's coming back, he can open them.

I feel a tear rolling my cheek down when I remember my present from last year.

He always wanted to go to London for a trip to see the Harry Potter studios. I got him and I the tickets but he's not here to see what he always wanted to see.

God knows what my little brother's eyes see now, without any of us knowing.

Soon enough, I found myself trembling like crazy and crying loudly. My eyes didn't stop watering, burning. It's crazy how faith and hope can keep human going, holding onto that little spark of hope that one day he might come back home.

Inhaling a shaky breath while wiping the wetness off my face away.

He'll come back one day.

We will go on a Harry Potter Studio tour together.

Forcing myself to finally stand up and go to work. Ethan is still in the hospital, tried calling me nonstop but he had to prove me better to convince me that he's sorry. I even turned my phone off for over ten hours so he couldn't reach me.

I didn't see Justin since what happened which made me really think about him more.

Some people deserved to be loved and some didn't ... I wanted to know why he thinks like this or who deserved to be loved. I mean.. at the end of the day, we all want to be loved by someone.

Taking a coffee with me, grabbing my keys as I head out of the apartment and rushed to my car. It took me a while to get to work and the second I enter in its building, the intern jumped on his spot hysterically with a pale face.

"Elle, someone is in your office," he says and I pull my eyebrows.

"Did you ask for their name?"

He nods, "he said, Grey."

"Excuse me, what did you say?" I hardly swallow down to clear my throat. I felt a wave of pressure hitting me, dragging me down and causing my body to sweat.

"His name is Grey. I asked him to stay out of your office but he didn't listen to me."

"I-it's okay. Thank you."

Ignoring my throbbing heart, opening my door as I see Justin standing in the middle of my office with his eyes fixed onto something. He held a picture of me in his hands where I'm 12 years old and proudly hold a fake award in my hands for cleaning my room.

Clearing my throat to get his attention. He didn't move, "you looked so happy there." His raspy voice comments as his eyes didn't leave my little self.

"I was a kid." I roll my eyes and sit down on my chair, walking pass him with weak knees and have the perfect view at his back, "why are you here?"

"Not every kid is happy. But you were, you should smile more often," he turns to me and lifted the picture of me and held it next to me from his sight, comparing me to my old self, "smiling looks good on you."