You know,
Sometimes I think about you.
Of all those times when you brought a ray of sunshine to my rain and how you did away with my shameful pain.
I think of all the times you brought some color to my grey with the beauty of your hue.
The friendship you provided me, that was the real shit. You were kind and accepting, never judging how I was.
You had this natural vibe filled with elegance, always joyful and proud. I don't even know how you came around.
But I'm glad you did, and I'm glad you had chosen me.
Being around you brought a smile to not only to my face but a smile to my soul. Even if it was for a while, you alone made me feel whole.
You alone, you alone. I'll confess that for a while all I wanted was to be with you alone.
To sit below the starry sky, turn to you as I looked into your eyes, and never face the day I'd have to say goodbye.
But hey, things happen for a reason right?
I know, I know. It wasn't fair to you,
It wasn't my place to make that decision for you and baby I have no justification .
It's just further proof that I am weak.
Even as you stood before me, giving me a friendly hello I could not speak.
To hell with my fortification.
These walls of mine, I blame them.
I blame them for being between us, for not allowing me to open up to you and for pushing you away.
I have punched these damned walls until my fist have bled, but I've had them up so long I couldnt get them to budge. Therefore I could not stay.
I never said what's in my heart, it just wouldnt had been fair to you.
I mean, nothing I have ever done has been fair, but still I choose to keep this part.
And still you shine even stronger than before.
Sometimes I think of you, and wonder.
Why the fuck do I have to be weak for?
I was surprised to see you again, but I am glad you stopped by. I know it probably didnt go as you expected, or if you had any expectations.
But that day I smiled again, just for a moment but I did.
So thank you for staying bright,
Thank you for all your might.
For the dark times, thank you for knowing how to fight and thank you for being my light.
Thank you for having held me,
And holding me up when I'd fall to my knees.
But most of all, thank you for having been with me.
Stay beautiful.
