deep down...

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i didn't reread this chapter for typos/errors — sorry about that

Merediths POV

I thought I had to throw up. It can't be him. It can't be-

"D-Derek?"

I turned to Andrew. He didn't understand what was happening. Truth be told, neither did I.

"I thought you... died," I said with a pain in my chest, "I sat next to you as you died. We had a funeral for you."

All he did was looked confused.

"This is a dream. I'm dreaming." I pinched my arm but he didn't go away.

"Deluca can you punch me or something."
"Umm. Sure." He lightly punched my arm.
"Deluca. That was not a punch."
"I'm not going to hit you again. He's really here." The last part of his sentence was hazy. Everything went blurry and I shook awake.

"Meredith!" Andrew was shaking me.
"What?" I asked, more of as a reassurance that I was awake.
"You were talking about Derek and looking at an empty bench."
"Oh I'm sorry. I've just been having these hallucinations recently and vivid dreams."

"Meredith-"
I cut him off because I knew exactly where this was going. "Andrew, I'm fine!"
"This isn't normal. I can take you to get checked out or something." I looked into his eyes before I got too mad. They were filled with worry and genuine concern.

I sighed but I gave in, "Ok I'll try it. But do you want to tell me what that was all about back in the restaurant?"
He just started laughing, "That's my cousin Mario. That side of my family always resents me for not continuing in the family business. They always say I'm a fancy doctor and I don't care about my family."

"I'm sorry. I know all about family members who don't understand you."
He moved his hand on top of mine.
I panicked and said, "We should probably get back to the hospital."
"Alright."

On the drive back, I avoided conversation. I wasn't sure I was able to be alone with him anymore, for obvious reasons. But, Andrew was making this very hard for me.

"So you got any surgeries later today?" He asked me, only breaking eye contact to look back at the road.
"Why do you want in on one?"
"No, I'm just trying to talk to you."
"Focus on the road. I don't want to get hit by a truck too."
"Meredith."
"Sorry I just... I need a minute."

<at the hospital>

I was in the attending's lounge getting ready to leave for the night. I almost forgot about the incident that happened outside of the restaurant. That is until I looked up to see Andrew standing in the door frame of the lounge.

"Andrew, what are you doing here?"
"What do you mean? Are you not going to see someone about the hallu-"
"Dr. Deluca. Don't finish that sentence."
"Oh so that's where we are now? I'm Dr. Deluca now?" He began walking into the lounge.
I looked away from him.

"Meredith come on."
"Dr. Deluca..." I started saying, but this time he cut me off.
"You can't ignore this forever and I can't do this forever. You're a doctor, you know this isn't normal." He's right, like always.
"Ok."
"Thank you."

He smiled to himself and started to walk out of the room.
"Wait!" He turned around eagerly.
"Yeah?"
"Could you maybe come with me? If it's not to weird for you..."
"Yeah of course I would."
"Thanks again. It means a lot." I got up from the couch where I was sitting and walked next to him.

"I know I wasn't going easy on you so just thanks." I said as I put my hand on his shoulder. He placed his hand on my waist and pulled me into a kiss. At first I resisted, but then I went along with it.

I pulled away and said, "Hey we should stop. Oh no."
"What's wrong?" I motioned towards Dr. Webber who was trying to get inside the lounge.

Andrew started blushing really hard and started apologizing, "Oh Dr. Webber I'm so sorry. I-I uhh."
"Deluca, just move out of the way." He responded sternly.
"I'll tell you when I make an appointment." I said as Andrew starting walking out of the room.
"Ok see you then." He called back.

"That's a rocky road to go down Meredith." He said while avoiding eye contact.
"Richard I can explain. We aren't dating and I don't know if we will."
"I've seen this happen before... I just want you to know I care about you and don't want to see you upset over a resident."

"Richard, I know what I'm getting myself into. He's just been really nice and helping me with some personal things. We're taking it slow."
"Sounds like you're dating to me, but what do I know? Bye Meredith."

He walked out of the room, unknowingly making me even more uncertain. I finished gathering my things and packed them into my bag. I looked at my phone and surprise surprise the unknown number was back again.

<in the text convo> (btw M is meredith and U: is the unknown caller guy)

U: "I know you're still talking to him."

This time I replied.

M: "Who are you and why do you even care that I'm talking to Deluca?"
U: "I can't tell you that, you'll find out soon enough anyway."
M: "What does that mean?"
U: "You'll see... I know you've missed me and that you still love me."

This time I replied more angrily because I was getting tired of this.
M: "I guarantee that I don't. I'm with Andrew now."
U: "Oh really? Do you mind if I tell someone else that?"
M: "Yes I do mind actually."
U: "Well too bad. You haven't been respectful to me and you certainly haven't cared about my warnings."
M: "Why should I? I don't know you."
U: "I can't tell you, I'm at risk. So here's a hint. 11vator and H.O.C."
M: "Seriously that's my hint?"
U: "I have to go now. Please try to figure it out."

I was kind of scared about these messages now. Who could this be and why do they care about my relationships so much?

Deep down, I knew. I knew exactly who it was as soon as they gave those hints.

sorry it took so long for this chapter.
Happy thanksgiving 💕

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