Behind the Curtain - Heathers

I am Damaged (Babs P.O.V)

Babs threw open the door just in time to see Dick step forward. He was actually going to do it. She put on a last burst of speed and leapt towards him, grabbing him wherever she could and pulling him back. He fell back onto the rooftop and Babs let out a relieved sigh. She managed to look at him as he got off of her and stood back up.

"Why did you do that?" He asked and she could hear how tired he was, something she had never heard in him before.

"To stop you from killing yourself," Babs got out between pants, at least she hadn't had to run all the way, Kid Flash had given her a little bit to convenient of a lift, but she was willing to let it slide.

"Why would you want to do that?" He asked.

"Because you don't deserve to die," Babs explained as she stood up, "You may be an absolute dickhead at the moment, but you don't deserve to die."

"You don't understand," Dick explained, "You couldn't."

"Try me," She said as she stepped closer to him, now there was two of them on the edge and her heart was racing, "I'm sure I will."

He looked at her, his face devoid of any emotions, he didn't seem sad that he was about to die, it was as if it was his only option as if he truly didn't care.

"I can't feel anything," He explained, "Happiness, sadness, not even anger. Haly might be dead, and I can't find it in myself to care. The only thing I can feel is this love for Zee, and it's driving me insane. It has no rhyme or reason, she doesn't even want to be around me. She slept with me once and then just didn't care after that. So why can the only thing I feel be love for her?"

"You must really love her then," Babs said, now looking ahead so she didn't have to see him admit it to her, "You didn't mean it with me."

"I didn't mean what with you?" Dick asked, and Babs turned to look at him in anger then.

"The kiss, at the gala?" She said, "Or am I that forgettable?"

He looked as if he was trying to think then and Babs got her answer, "Fine, then I guess we can both jump together."

"No," He said as he grabbed her wrist, "You don't deserve to die."

"Really, because I was living for you," She burst out, tears falling freely once again, "I may pretend my life is great but it's not. I barely ever see my dad because he has to work all day and all night shifts just so we can eat every day. I may attend a private school, but it doesn't mean I'm any good, I fail half my classes but I brush it off because you probably wouldn't want to be friends with a failure. I have had this debate with myself so many time, so don't think you're the only one who wants to die, but I didn't act on it because I had something worth living for. You. Because I love you." She paused for a moment, "I love you, Dick. All your faults, all your wrongdoings, even with the stunt you pulled on me at the gala to only hook up with Zatanna the next day. And I'm always going to love you because that just doesn't go away, no matter how hard I want it to. No matter how much I know you don't love me back. So if you die, I guess you kill me anyway, whether or not I jump."

"I'm sorry," Dick said and they settled into silence, just looking at each other.

Babs thought she heard a voice then, "Removere a caritate ratio" but she didn't turn to look, scared that as soon as she let her eyes leave Dick's he would be gone. So they just stared at each other, the only noise the sharp wind. Dick looked away first, looking towards the door, an almost grateful look passing over his face, then he turned back to the drop.

"Dick-" Babs started as she saw the thoughts cross his mind.

"I'm so sorry Babs," He said, still looking down, "I do remember that kiss. It was the best kiss of my life, I'll never forget it. And I do love you as well. I've always loved you, but I hurt you. For weeks I've just blown you off and you don't deserve that. Not you, you deserve someone who can give you so much more. You can't change my mind. I have to do this, it's the only way."

"Then I have to do it with you," Babs said, "You can't change mine."

"Please," He started.

"I don't care about what kind of tricks you want to try and pull now, saying you love me again isn't going to get me to let you go," She argued, "I'm following you, whatever you do next, I'm coming with you."

"Then one final parting gift," He said and turned to her.

"One final parting gift," She repeated.

Shock overtook her as he kissed her. But she didn't fight it, she had never wanted to, even with how much she hated him right now. It just felt right that this was how they went out. It was saltier than at the gala, her tears had snuck into the mix, but it was sweeter, a farewell. And she was glad that would be her final memory. They pulled apart and looked at each other a moment.

"Ready?" Dick asked.

"Ready," Babs replied and he took a step over the edge again.

But she wasn't ready, she didn't want to die. She had so much left in her life, so much she still wanted to do.

"Wait," Babs said, catching him just before he dropped all his weight over nothingness, "I can't. I can't. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," He said, "I'm not afraid."

"Will you walk me back down?" Babs asked, "I don't want to walk down by myself."

She could swear she saw a hint of Dick's signature smirk at her antics.

"Only if you promise not to let me fall over the railing," He said.

"I promise," She said and they walked away from the edge.