Falsettos Oneshots

Marvin?//Homosexuals

I... really like the use of Homosexuals for Marvin n Whizzer, so,,

Important stuff: If you can't already tell, this oneshot book will MOSTLY be full of Marvin n Whizzer because I enjoy writing gay stuff. I mostly use writing as a coping mechanism, especially because I'm going through some shit right now, the first couple of oneshots will probably be angst. Not because I like hurting you, but because, if you've never used writing as a coping mechanism, it's like WEIGHTS off of your shoulders, dude. And!! Unless I make it clear that Marvin n Whizzer are different ages, just assume that they're the same age. Thinking about them being ten years apart just makes me feel weird about writing stuff lmao

Anyways, this takes place in senior year.

*Intermediate Trigger Warning*

Drip, drip, drip,

That is the sound my stray tears seem to make as they hit the paper, managing to flow faster than I would usually dare to let them. My hand is moving the pen, but at the same time, I don't remember how to move my hand in the slightest. I know that it's moving, but I can't tell if I'm the one to be moving it or if it somehow just knows what it's doing, scribbling down the words as they pop into my head one by one. The hard part has been over for a long time, the issue of who to address the letter to in the first place. Unlike many other people, I'd made the decision to address the note to one person and one person only. After a minute or two, I realized that there was really only one person in the world that my letter belongs to- Whizzer Brown. He is my boyfriend, after all.

Whizzer,

I know that this is one of the dumbest decisions a person will ever make. I want to stay with you, to love you, and to hold you, that's all I want and have ever wanted. But, as they say, nothing comes simple. Really, who says that? Back to the point; everything's too much. The constant yelling and screaming around here, the fact that everybody's misery very obviously traces back to me. Nobody deserves to be bugged by me, not you, not anyone, and I will no longer continue to do so. I love you. I love you so much, more than my words can and could ever say. Please be careful out there, Whizzer. You're beautiful and amazing, and anybody who doesn't see it is an asshole. Damn, I never thought I'd be the one to write the cheesy "I'm killing myself letter", but, hey, here I am. I'm sorry that you have to read this today. I'm sorry that you've had to read this any day. I know that I've said this a million and one times, but, I love you. I don't really know how to finish this off. Can you tell how bad I am at goodbyes? I hate the thought of leaving you. I can't stand thinking about not being able to kiss you. Sometime, we'll meet again, right? Sometime. I love you.

Goodbye,

Marvin <3

I drop the letter into Whizzer's mailbox, looking up at the house, and for just a moment, I consider running up there and ringing the doorbell. Whizzer would answer, and I'd tell him everything. Somehow, someway, he'd make everything better. He always does. The idea sounds almost too appealing. If happiness is so close and in my reach, why is it so hard for me to grab it?

"Marvin? What the hell are you doing out there? And in only a sweater, it's freezing. Get your ass over here." I look up, tears immediately threatening to spill as I see Whizzer, standing right there on the porch, three seconds away. Just three seconds away. I rapidly shake my head, taking a step back and into the street. I hear a beep and quickly spin around, stumbling backward and into Whizzer's arms. He twirls me back around to face him, and heat rises to my cheeks as I stare at his pink-tinted face, his arms slinking around my waist. "Marvin, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry," Is all I can manage to say, just barely able to form the words in my throat. Every single part of my body is shaking. "I, I p-put, um, I put it in the mailbox, I'm so sorry," Whizzer shoots me a confused glance, letting go of me rather quickly and spinning on his heels, grabbing my letter from his mailbox. He quickly snatches my hand, observing the tear-stained envelope with a glare as he pulls me harshly up the stairs and into his house. There's no hope of keeping the tears in now, as he sits on the couch, lowering me down with him, and they continue to fall as Whizzer's facial expression changes from upset to even more upset to somewhere in between. He crumbles the letter up in his hands, inhaling deeply as he looks down at for a couple of seconds, wiping his eyes.

"When were you planning on doing this?" He whispers, not looking up at me.

"Just after putting the letter in the mailbox," I say, and he lifts my chin, scanning my eyes with his, almost as if they contain the answers to the universe.

"What with?"

"Pills," I say, quickly shoving my hands in my pockets. Bringing them with me is most definitely the worst idea I've ever had. Whizzer quickly stands up, grabbing me by the wrist and pulling me with him. Still clinging onto my wrist, he grabs a plastic bag from his kitchen, looking me in the eyes, slowly letting go of my wrist with a shaky hand. I've never seen fear as clearly in his eyes as I see right now.

"Empty your pockets. The moment I asked, you put your hands in your pockets." He says, furrowing his eyebrows. I don't respond. Instead, I just continue to stand here, looking up into his eyes, barely able to breathe or think or talk, biting my lip. Whizzer's grip on the bag tightens. "That wasn't a question, Marvin." Slowly, I reach into my pockets. Fifty-seven pills in total fall into the bag as I take fist-fulls of them, trying to get them all out of my pockets. "Is that all?" I nod. He sighs in relief, tying up the bag and setting it on the counter. Seeing them all wrapped up and almost completely out of my reach (Whizzer would kick my ass if I went for them), a sense of loss fills my stomach. Whizzer, who had most likely seen me staring, gently leads me out of the kitchen and back into his room, shutting the door. He flops onto his bed, rolling over and reaching his arms out for me. I smile a bit, slowly crawling in to lay down next to him. He buries his face into my neck.

"Whizzer?" I say, running my hand up and down his shoulder.

"Hm?" He hums.

"Thank you." He nods.

"I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. So goddamn much." I exhale, using my thumb to wipe a stray tear from his cheek. "Don't leave me," He whimpers, tracing up and down my jawline. "Marvin?"

"What?"

"Promise you won't leave me? Not like that?" He says, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I promise," I say, knowing that there's a somewhat high chance my words may ring untrue. Whizzer huffs, satisfied, shutting his eyes. "I love you, Whizzer."

"And I love you, Marvin."