Falsettos Oneshots

Swippity Swoppity//Homosexuals (And friends)

For once in a long, long time, Marvin woke up to an empty bed. To any other person, this may not have been as confusing as it was for Marvin, as Whizzer always slept until at least ten. Today, though, it was eight in the morning, and sure enough, nobody else was in his room. He stretched, standing up and throwing a random shirt on before walking downstairs.

"Whizzer?" Much to Marvin's surprise, Whizzer was downstairs watching the... news? Usually, when he woke up, Whizzer would go straight to watching some lame hetero soap opera. Marvin shrugged it off.

"Oh! Hey, Marvin!" Another thing that strikes confusion into Marvin: why was he so cheery today? Usually the first thing he'd do is yell at Marvin for something stupid, like his outfit. "How'd you sleep?" Marvin shifted awkwardly, raising a brow.

"Okay?" He paused. "Is something going on?"

"No, why?"

"You seem... I don't know, not you?" Marvin explained. Whizzer shrugged.

"I'm fine, Marvin, I don't know what seems off to you." He paused. "Also, fair warning, I'm not in the mood for any lovey-dovey stuff today, so, don't get mad if I hit you with a frying pan or something." 

"Okay?"

"Also, Kevin and Connor are coming over today, they should be getting here any time soon."

Kevin was Whizzer's identical twin. In all honesty, Marvin hated the thought of somebody out there that looked exactly like Whizzer. It was weird, and unsettling. Kevin was nice and all, but, it still spooked the shit out of Marvin sometimes.

"They got back from Uganda?" Marvin asked. A painful cringe shot onto Whizzer's face for a split second, but it quickly went back to normal. "Yeah, they got back last week, remember?"

"No, I don't actually think you did."

"Maybe I forgot." Whizzer says, and almost immediately after, the doorbell rings, and Whizzer jumps to get it. Hesitantly, Marvin follows, watching as Whizzer opened the door to say hello to his brother and said brother's boyfriend. Strangely, upon making eye-contact with Kevin, a strange feeling of relief flooded through Marvin, and his cheeks flooded a bright pink. Wait a minute, Marvin thought, confused. He wasn't falling for Whizzer's brother, right? No, no, of course not. He was just flustered to see basically two Whizzers in one room.  Kevin stuck out his hand for Marvin to shake, and it felt all-too familiar to Marvin. He quickly shook it off- this was his boyfriend's brother he was talking about.

"Hello, Marvin, how nice it is to see you!" He said through rather exaggerated glee. Marvin raised his eyebrows.

"Nice to see you too," he said.

"Hey, Marvin? Why don't we give Kevin and Whizzer some brother-on-brother time and go talk in the garage for a minute?" Connor asked, quickly grabbing Marvin by the arm and dragging him outside.

"They switched, didn't they?" Marvin asked quietly, crossing his arms. Connor nodded.

"Not only is it the most unoriginal idea ever, but they're terrible actors." Connor sighed. Marvin laughed.

"Should we tell 'em we know?"

"Nah. Let's make em jealous first." Marvin quickly agreed to that plan, and soon, they went inside, pretending to laugh their asses off. "Ohemgosh, you guys! Marvin just told the funniest joke!" Connor laughed, climbing right next to the real Whizzer and laying his head on the boy's shoulder. Immediately, Whizzer cringed, but did his best to hide it. Marvin wrapped his arms around Kevin, smiling at him in fake awe.

"Okay, I quit, I can't take five more seconds of this. Marvin!" Whizzer yelled, turning to Marvin, who jumped onto his lap almost like a cat.

"Whizzer." He said, kissing him quite passionately. "You look great in Mormon clothes, I must say, but it doesn't really suit you all that well." Marvin gushes. Whizzer shakes his head, looking up at him with a wide grin.

"Really? I thought so too." He paused. "How'd you guys figure it out?"

"I knew something was up when there was nobody in bed at eight in the morning, so I come downstairs to find 'Whizzer'," He said, making air quotes, "Watching the news." He paused. "And also, just because he looks the same doesn't mean I feel the same towards him." Whizzer shrugged.

"He wanted to climb into bed with you to make it more authentic but I wouldn't let him." Ma4in laughs.

"How did you figure it out, Con?" Kevin asked, looking next to him, where Connor was now sitting.

"The first thing he said to me when I came downstairs was 'why the eff are you down here so early?' Except, he actually said it." Kevin laughed, looking over at Whizzer.

"You're really something, you know that?"

"You got a bible shoved up your ass last year! How can you talk?" Whizzer hissed.

"It was a Book of Mormon, and it was for a good cause, dang it! I didn't tell the man to shove the thing up there!"

"I'm sure you guys barely need to prep." Marvin notes, and Kevin blushes, shrugging. Marvin just squeezed Whizzer tighter. He'd gone only twenty minutes without him, but it still felt like decades.

"Did someone miss me?" Whizzer asked, giggling.

"Yes. Yes, I did, in fact." Marvin says.

"Good to know, because, never again."