Every Lifetime I Fall {COMPLETED but undergoing revisions}

Chapter 139: YZH VII

We walked side by side along the banks of Dark Fall Lake. Rong Xin's warm hand tells me she is nervous. I laugh to myself thinking about how we're both anxious in one another's presense.

Approaching the end of Dark Fall Lake, a stream trickles with sounds of running water. I release Rong Xin's hand and sit down on the grass.

She asks, "Master, why did you bring me here?"

I say, "I feel bad for not keeping my promise to go watch fireworks with you, so I brought you here."

She sits down next to me, holding her knees. "This is just a stream from the lake. What's so special about it?"

She's still sulking... Is it not time yet? I wonder what is keeping them?

As Wu Jing advised... One of the main ways to appease her is affection, kind words and sweets?

"Take it." I hand over the almond cookies that I had wrapped with a handkerchief.

"What is it?"

"I know you're going to get hungry around this time, so I prepared it."

"Huh? Thanks..." She accepts the cookies and unwraps them. Taking a bite, she is contemplating the taste.

"Rong Xin, look." I point to the flying fireflies. I stand to watch the hundreds of bugs surround the area.

She stands as well with a wide smile. Her eyes reflecting light of curious joy.

"Not as grand as fireworks, but fireflies are just as beautiful," I say without taking my eyes off of her.

"Master?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

She's an odd one.

"Why are you thanking me all of a sudden?"

"That... you are trying to be considerate of my feelings."

It's not as though I didn't wrong you first.

"You don't have to thank me," I tell her. "I'm at fault. I'm not the brightest when it comes to things like this."

She doesn't look at me with her sullen expression.

"Wu Jing had to remind me that you were waiting for me. He was really angry that I kept you waiting. I've never really grown accustomed to take others' feelings into consideration. The truth is I don't know how I feel about you."

But I want to know if I can really come to love you. Without consequences. Can we just spend time like this with each other forever?

She finally looks at me. "You mean you still love Miss Ming Yan."

What does she mean Ming Yan? In the past, I have asked Ming Yan to stay at Bleak Night. I'd grown accustomed to her friendship. I didn't want her to completely shut me out of her life and run back to Song Wei Long... However, when it comes to love... I don't know if I see her that way.  

"For some time, she was a woman I often thought about," I tell her honestly. "I don't know if I love her, but it is a strange feeling I feel when she denies to remain by my side... Rong Xin, you on the other hand begged to stay by my side as though I was the only viable path for you. You left your family, your home to be with me. Don't you miss your them?"

Would you ever think to leave me?

"I-- I guess it would be a lie if I said I didn't. One day I may return, but right now I just want to live for me."