Holding On (A Harry Styles Love Story)

Too Real.

Isn't it funny how your life can chance in just a few moments? My life is a prime example of that.

One moment- The plane is landing. I'm escorted to my car by a guard. The darkness of the night is bleak and suffocating. I ignore the sudden impulse that something terrible is going to happen, and I load my things and listen to the roar of the engine as I start to drive off into the darkness.

The next moment- My emotions are numb, and I'm thoughtless while I stare blankly ahead at the endless highway ahead of me. The warning impulse comes back so I focus hard on the road trying not to get into a wreck.

It shouldn't have been me that I was worrying about.

After countless minutes of driving, I pull into my neighborhood. The streetlights are the only thing illuminating in the 11:30pm darkness. Most of the neighbors are at home repeating the motions of their normal lives. Getting ready for bed so that they can get up and go to work in the morning. Most of the kids have been asleep for hours so they can go to school. Maybe some of the neighbors were hurting as badly as I was. Maybe some of the neighbors had the best day of their lives. Who knows? It's hard to know how people feel unless you ask them- and sometimes they don't give you an honest answer and you still don't know. If anyone asked me how I felt at that moment, I would put on a smile and say "I'm good, how are you?". It's just hard to open up to people. The only person I could really open up to was Harry, and I wouldn't have him for a long time.

Moments later- I'm pulling into my drive way and I notice that there aren't any cars in the driveway. I know that I took my mom's, but shouldn't my sister's be there? Oh well, maybe they went to get something to eat. I park the car in the empty garage, turning the key off and going around to get my stuff out of the trunk. I walk around to the front of the house and fumble for the keys in my pocket. I finally get them and twist them in the lock. I open the door slowly and quietly just in case they were home. Our house was so small that the smallest noises could wake someone up if they were sleeping. I step in the house to find that it's completely dark..except for a small light from a lamp shining in the living room. I hear groans and moans and unintelligible words. I can't see the source, but they sound like my mom.

The next moment- I'm dropping everything and running into the living room. I find my mother bent over on her knees on the floor. She's clutching the phone in her hands and she's shaking.

"Mom?" I hastily scream and I drop next to her on the floor, "Mom? What happened?"

She's still shaking. But she takes a deep breath and screeches and now I can see that she's also crying.

"Mom?!" I start to get angry that she won't talk to me, although I know that I shouldn't. "Mom, look at me!"

She looks up and I see her eyes: red, swollen, and full of fear and agony. Her face is twisted into something awful and panicked. I was terrified. My mind was racing at 100 miles an hour, and I didn't know what to think. What did I say? Did I sit beside her and try to comfort her even though I had no idea what was going on? No, I was going to demand to know what the deal was. Because if she was crying this hard, it must effect me too. Frustration, confusion, terror.. they all run through my veins.

"Mom! Mom talk to me! What happened?!" I screech, and I'm starting to cry, too.