Coffee and cigarettes (changlix)

catorce - cafe sin sabor

Chan peeked his head as he saw them entered and did his best to smile even as it hurt to see them together he reminded himself it was for the best for changbin and so he began to prepare their usual drinks and made sure to be far so he wouldnt eves drop.

Changbin and felix sat in the same spot they always did before and a silence engulfed them, changbin playing with his fingers anxiously and Felix simply looking at him  the nervousness evident in the way he shook his leg.

They didnt speak for a while they simply sat in silence, it hurt the both of them but neither seemed to be able to break it. The drinks arrived and both males sipped it until felix couldnt take it anymore.  He inhaled shakily and as he let his breathe go he began to talk "I'm sorry... I'm so so sorry binne.. this is all my fault and I'm having trouble even speaking about it" he paused taking a deep breath and began to finnaly explain why he had acted the way he did and changbin listened intently and things began to click "my ex called me.. the one I told you about that one time where I later asked you to forget and never ask me about"

*flashback*

Changbin held a shaking felix, they were outside in the cold but felix wasnt shaking because of it, felix was scared and tears streamed down his face as he clung to the older taking shaky breaths, they stayed like that for the longest time before changbin was able to finnaly coax words out of the younger boy in his arms "hes going to find me.. h-he said he loved me but all he did was hurt me.. I dont no I cant go back.." his voice trailed off as he cried again and changbin understood even from the few words that the boy used to be in a toxic most likely abusive relationship "it's okay lix I'm here okay,  I wont let him hurt you anymore" the boy nodded softly and  tried to calm down only saying that he never wanted to talk about the previously mentioned boy.

*end of flashback*

Changbin nodded understandingly, he had kept to his word and never asked him about it.. he glanced at the younger and felix spoke again, his voice was shaky and his eyes didnt meet him "H-he said he knew you.. and that he would hurt you.. I couldnt let that happen.. y-you mean alot to me" he hiccuped as his eyes became teary "when I met you I thought I could finnaly be free.. I was wrong of course but I didnt give up because of you... I- I like you"

Changbin reached out lightly placing his hand on top of Felix's, a tear ran down his cheek "I like you too lix, you can be free.. "

Felix shook his head lightly "n-no I cant let you get hurt because of me.. I'm only here because he wanted me to say goodbye.. I was suppose to be harsh and cold and say I didnt care about you but when I saw you that day I lost my composure, h-he got mad and if I dont let you go now we are both going to be hurt so I cant binnie.."

He stood up shakily and as he was about to reach. Changbin turned him around, he came closer and pulled the youngers collar down pressing his lips against him, felix kissed back and they stayed that way for a moment but then changbin pulled away. His hand traced the youngers features "I love you and even after we leave here I'm not going to give up on you"

Felix shook his head "im leaving back to Australia when I can get away from him.. I might never come back" changbin pressed a kiss to his forehead "do it.. I'll find you.. you just have to let me lix okay?" Felix hesitantly nodded "i-ill try.. now I have to go" changbin nodded and let him go, he stood there for a while even after he couldnt see the younger outside and then he left as well.