Last Words

Future

Most of my readers know me pretty well. Given that we're on this site at least. For the other people I'll say this real quick. I'm not an outsider who doesn't understand. I'm sorta depressed, and I've wanted to cut before. I'm starting to know someone named Ana better than I would want, and yes I've had suicidal thoughts IN THE PAST. Just try to understand, I'm not a stranger to how you feel. Okay well here it is.

It will get better, and it will get worse. You'll think you have it all figured out and then you'll think you're going crazy. You will do amazing things, and you wil help many people. You will do horrible things, and you will hate yourself SO MUCH for those things. Or maybe, you won't. And you will fall hard for people. They will be older than you. They will be younger than you, and you two will be the same age. They might be girls, they might be boys. Some will like you back. Some won't. There WILL be people who like you and you won't like them. Maybe you'll know this. Maybe you won't. You will fall in love multiple times. You will be heartbroken, and you will break hearts. You will feel guilty and you will feel proud. But you will one day find yourself doing something you love. It might be a job, one you've always dreamed of or one you never dreamed you would do. Or maybe it won't be a job, maybe you'll never love your job. But there will be a love of your life who loves you back. Just as much as you love them. All of this and more will happen, but that's the thing. Will it? You can't see the future, I presume. I know for sure I can't. But there is a way to find out what that future of yours will be. Live that life, find that future. It's the only way to reach those goals, to see new places, to live your dreams. But you have to persevere through these years, tough as they may be. You have to take a deep breath and tell yourself that there's still a tomorrow. You have to look in the mirror and feel love. Even if you hate yourself. You need to think of someone that loves you. Someone that you love too. They love you for a reason. And you might not know that reason, but it still exists. Or they still exist I suppose. And you need to take all of the love that you have for them and place it on yourself and love yourself. Because even if you don't know why, people love you so let them. Let them compliment you. Let yourself shine. Stay strong and make it through this. Because don't people always mention the light at the end if the tunnel? Well there's gotta be a tunnel to walk through if you want to get there. So what are you gonna do? You are going to stay strong. And get stronger. And be brave. And accept yourself. And look up and look towards the future. Look towards YOUR future. Because it's gonna be pretty awesome and pretty fun. And through the tears and smiles and friends and heartbreaks, you will find yourself. And one day, you will be glad you decided not to just give up.

But even if you're not THAT sad. Most likely there will be a day. Where you will be crying yourself to sleep and suddenly you'll wonder why is this worth it, why don't I just give up? And suddenly you'll consider it. And it's then that you'll need to know. That people love you and care about you. That there's a future ahead that nobody knows. And that there's millions of reasons to stay that you just don't know yet. So please, stay strong. Find that bright future ahead of you. It's there and it's waiting for you to discover it. Possibly impatiently. Take care, and take a smile on your way out. ;)

Tell me someday something that you found out, some 'secret' about life that you discovered. Some life hack maybe? ;D Just make sure that you're alive long enough to find one.