[CLOSED] Ask and Dare Eeveelutions

Dare - Beijing: Eat Nothing but Cow Pie for a Week

Evelyn - Hey! We got mail!

Jan - Really? Who sent it?

Evelyn - I dunno, it just says "Beyond Wattpad" for the return address.

Jan - Well, what does it say?

Evelyn - It says its a dare!

Jan - Oh boy, I'll get everyone gathered round.

Jan calls everyone outside to have the dare read.

Jan - Alright, here is the dare. This dare is for Beijing. She must..." Oh dear... "She must eat nothing but Cow pie for a week."

Warszawa - UGGGHHHHH!
Warszawa proceeds to puke behind himself into the grass.

Ottawa - That's - really gross...

Jessie snickers.

Beijing - What's the big deal? Beef is delicious!

Jan - Its not exactly beef, Beijing...

Jessie - She should have a blind tasting just so she'll eat it the first time.

Beijing - Oh, does it just look bad? This is fine. I'm not so faint as you.

Jan - Okay, then.

Jan procures a bag filled with cow pies and, with gloves, removes one from the bag and gives it to Beijing to eat.

Jan - Alright, Beijing, here is (hurk), here is "food."

Beijing - Alright, here we go. Ahh...

Beijing takes up a spoonful of the cow pie and immediately retches.

Beijing - What the heck?! This tastes like grass and suffering!

Krakow - Well, cows do eat grasses.

Beijing - Yeah, but beef never tasted like this before!

Beijing takes off her blindfold and looks down in horror.

Beijing - This looks like crap!

Jan - Uh, Beijing? "Cow pie" is cow poop.

Beijing - You're kidding. I have to eat cow poop for a week?!

Jan - I'm afraid that's how it goes. I'm sorry.

Beijing - Not as sorry as you're GOING to be!!

Beijing thrusts Jan's head into the pie. Jessie and Evelyn soon take up pies, and it devolves into a "food" fight. Soon, everyone except Abuja, who was too big to get close enough to be hit, was covered in fecal matter. They soon went in and cleaned themselves off (much to the chagrin of Evelyn and Berlin, who were childish children who would rather smell like cow pie than be clean), and Beijing frustratedly resigned to fulfil the dare.

Beijing - Alright, anonymous person from beyond, I'll play your game. But you had better give Jessie the same kind of treatment, or I'll find you, and then you can join her when I'm the Supreme Leader.

Jan - OK boomer.

Beijing - Wh-what?! How long have you been standing there?!

Jan - Long enough to know you're planning a coup or something. This is all in text; we can each go back and read what happens, but apparently I'm the only one who does. I'd like to tell you, your coup is completely unnecessary. I'm not the leader; no one is.

Beijing - You're wrong! And you won't change my mind!

Beijing runs off.

Jan - Tsk, Tsk, poor little Sylveon. When will you figure it out?