Rescuing Atticus

Learning to clean

Song: The dark of you- Breaking Benjamin

He takes me out side. We walk way past the pool and then to another area. I knew he had the barn like structure back here but I didn't realize that he had so many animals. When we get to the barn we walk around black to a fenced in area that has a few goats and sheep. "Pick one out...and kill it." He has a gun, a knife and a hammer on the table beside us. "Go on...pick your weapon and kill it."

I have never killed a living thing in my life. I just stand there and look at the animals running around freely. Why does he want me to do this; it's not like they have done anything to me? I wait too long and he picks up the knife and walks over to the sheep. I watch as he wraps his arm around its neck and holds it close to him with one arm then with the other he pulls the knife out and hold it to his throat and with one quick movement he slices it from one side of the neck to the other. Blood spills out and it goes down with his body jerking...the life inside draining all of his body. He looks up at me and smirks...waiting on me to pick either the gun or the hammer.

I pick up the gun and walk over to one of the goats. My hand freaking trembles so much that I almost drop the dam thing so I grasp it even harder till my knuckles start to turn white and my palms are all sweaty. I hold it close to his head and close my eyes before letting my finger pull back the trigger. He falls right over; the bullet went all the way through. I hated to look at the limp body on the ground and I can't rack my brain over the fact that I just took a life of a living thing.

Zane walks over and hands me a knife. "Now gut him out."

I feel a lump form in the back of my throat. "I...don't know how to do that."

He shakes his head almost in disbelief that I have no clue what to do. He pulls the sheep over to him and digs into its underside cutting him from the neck all the way down to his privates. The sound of him cutting into the body the way he did made me tense up, I thought for sure I would toss everything up.

I watch him as he works, taking out this organ and that organ, in nice movements...so nice that I think he could have been a surgeon before. He hands me the knife and I cut into the goat. He points and shows me where to cut and I do everything that he ask me to do but it's nowhere as perfect as his.  Hell...to be honest it is no where freaking close to his.

"You need to practice Atticus...your hands are too shaky...you are fucking up each organ...I can't use any of this shit...you will cost me money. Clean this shit up." He stands up and leaves me there with these two slaughtered animals.

I get to work cleaning up the best that I know how. I hate that I am not good at this and I feel that I will never be as good as he hopes me to be...I will be a huge disappointment to him like I am to everyone else.

He comes back thirty minutes later and I see the look on his face. I can't even get this part right. I stand up with blood all over me from head to toe. I shrug my shoulders. "Show me how...I want to learn."

"Are you going to pay attention? I can't waste my time showing you and training you the right way if you are not going to do it correctly."

"I want to learn...show me now sir."

He leaves and comes back. "These are the chemicals that we will be using. I want you to put on these gloves...always wear gloves do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Now pick up this body and carry it to the tub over there; place it on the ground beside it. I want you to watch me."

 I do exactly what I am told. I pick up the dead sheep and carry it over to the tub. I watch as he saws into it, cutting off limb by limb. He hands me each part and tells me to place it in the tub. Once completely severed in sections he hands me a gallon and tells me to slowly pour it onto the pieces. I stand up and do what I am told and watch the acid eat away at the flesh and the bones. The smell makes me gag but I don't puke.

"Now to properly clean up this mess...here start scrubbing." He hands me the sponge and another bottle with some kind of bleach or something in it...I don't ask questions, I just do what I am told to do. When we are done he smiles. "Now tomorrow we will practice again...and we will practice till you can do this on your own. I can't be on a job and try to explain to you how to do it properly. You sure you can handle this"

"Yes sir...I can."

"Good...get some rest now...see you in the morning."

For the rest of the week, I wake up early. We eat breakfast, workout and then he brings me into the back yard for me to slaughter yet another animal and then clean the shit up. I know this is not the real job...the real job has to do with people. I can now kill an animal without even thinking about it but I'm not sure I can actually kill a person.

In the middle of the next week he gets a call. He messages me to meet him in the driveway. I get in the back without asking any questions. We arrive at a home. "Atticus before going in there you need to know these people are already dead...we are only here to clean up the mess got it...dispose the bodies and get the place looking back to normal as if nothing ever happened. We need to secure the place first. I need you to be on the lookout if anyone is still alive...you will have to kill them. Do you think you can handle that?"

"Yes sir." I tell him I can handle it. I want to handle it. I want him to be proud of me.

I get out with him and we sweep the house. There are two dead guys in the back of the house. The rest of the house is empty. We get to work. I let him take whatever organs he needs and then he lets me hack at them. I help him place the bodies into the bathtub on the bottom floor and as he disposes of the bodies I go back to the room to clean up the floor. I keep going over some spots because I don't want to leave a speck behind. I will show him that I can do this.

He walks in behind me and smiles. "Damn...this looks really good...I can tell you have been practicing a lot."

"Thanks...I was taught by the best."

He only smirks and walks out of the house. I follow after him.

When we both get in the car and the door shut, he hands me a glass with whiskey and smirks a shit eating grin. "To my new partner...welcome aboard."