8 Lives (Sequel to Shattered)

Chapter 20: Recreate

Hey guys this was supposed to be posted last night, and I could swear I posted it but it seems I didn't. So when I checked to see it now I realized that I forgot to post it. Truly sorry. Next time I will double check that I posted it.

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8 Lives Chapter 20- Recreate

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Edward's POV

The pain only grew on the drive home; staying in place, watching my life go by, was something that made the pain the more real. It was better to walk than to stay in place, and have each thought jab itself into me even more than it should have. Staying in place made all my thoughts combine into an enormous weight of sadness, but with walking I would have all of the tension slowly decreased. Even though the decrease wouldn't be drastic, it would be something in the end. And that's all I could hope for: Something.

Emmett and Jasper's voices were droned out as I soon began to slip away from reality. Their endless chatter to try and coerce me to see what little benefits can come of this, was soon a pile of nothingness. There were no benefits of my situation, period. Nothing is going the way it was supposed to be, but that's how it's always been. One wrong turn before getting back on track in an even better way. But this time it's different. It isn't only one wrong turn, it's more than I can count. There's Bella not having any remembrance, Remessmee thinking that the accident with Joseph was all planned by Bella and so on. It's all too much for me to even comprehend what's going on.

None of it adds up.

As we neared our house I heard my angel speaking, and that was all it took for me to disengage myself from my rueful thoughts. She was questioning Esme on the house, and how gallant it all seemed. Slowly a smile began to creep onto my face, remembering the first time I brought her to the house. The warmness she brought through me with just one of her flush smiles filled with blood rising to her cheeks.

The way her chocolate brown eyes lit up whenever I was around, making me feel important to the world I lived, that only consisted of loneliness. The memories of all of our moments in this house began flooding into my head, letting the smile deepen across my face. I sighed, only time will tell if I am going to be the only one to cherish our memories that we had together.

Time is now my greatest enemy.

Esme's thoughts were consisted of only worry on how everything will effect her now. I stiffened at the worst possibility of her never wanting to be with such a monster. When I referred to myself as a monster in the past, she soothed me by telling me that I was far from one. Fate was ever so kind to let her fall in love with me once, yet is it ever so kind to let her remember me?

The door became ajar and I noticed Emmett and Jasper's pity in their eyes, which angered me. I never wanted nor needed their pity towards me, it is enough that I pity myself, I don't need it. I thread my fingers through my hair and tugged, as if to separate my hair from me.

"Yes you do Edward, we all need to feel sorry for our family's "lost". You aren't in this alone." Jasper grabbed my shoulder and brought me to stand; when all I wanted to do was crawl in a hole and let death take me.

Emmett and Jasper pushed me in front of them, taking the precaution, because they thought that I would run away as the coward I am. I've run away before, causing grief to my family, mostly Esme, which was why I had vowed since that day never to run off; though times are different, and it isn't before long that I break that vow.