How to be a good lad [ ziall ] { on hold }

n i n t e e n

        -A week later-

I sat in Zayn's lap in the mess hall, the collar had begun to chafe and I repeatedly tugged at it

"Please loosen it" I asked for the sixth time

"I said later"

The thing was caused a huge annoyance and I think that I have a rash under it.

All my sweat collects under it and lately I've been deciding whether or not I should ask Zayn to sleep without it.

I decided I would, but not here in the mess hall.

I'd finished my classes and was a little sweaty but after being handed a towel and a cold shower I was better.

Zayn was warm, I on the other hand was freezing my penis off from the icy water I'd cleaned myself under

I shivered, Zayn brought his lips to my ear

"Go get a blanket"

I got up without him I wandered to his room.

It took me a while to find a blanket, though I decided to use the thin striped one on Zayn's couch.

I wrapped it around my body and sat with Zayn who offered me the rest of his food

I happily inhaled the cream filled chocolate sponge cake in a matter of seconds, blushing as the other boys around Zayn laughed.

They began giving me food too, pushing things in front of me with Zayn's permission.

I didn't eat this morning, after being caught with my collar off I got into trouble and I got my breakfast privileges taken off me for two days. And that was yesterday morning which meant tomorrow I could have breakfast again.

-
-

I watched Zayn take his own class, I sat curiously because I didn't think Majors actually did any classes.

It was only a fifteen minute thing though and Zayn explained it was just a course that tested the sanity of everyone.

I didn't question the answer and during him becoming a lieutenant, I sat with my head in his lap, pleading to at least be played with

"Niall, I'm busy"

"I am bored" I whined "entertain me, please"

"Entertain yourself"

I grumbled but sat on my knees in front of him.

I went to hug him, I put my arms around his chest but I was pushed back into the grass, landing right on a ball

"Shit!" Zayn exclaimed

The thing drove between my shoulders and I blubbered for the next half hour about how sore it was.

It was a solid baseball I had landed on and Zayn had already told me my skin was bruising.

When I got taken back after dinner I crawled straight to my corner, only to be lifted off the floor by him.

He lay me on the mattress and I closed my eyes

"Sleep" he whispered

He got in after, I was obviously in here because of my injury.

I slept facing away from Zayn and he also faced away from me to prove that this was just sympathy for the injured.

His bed was a whole lot comfier that mine and the pillow I slept on smelt of his divinity. Curling my fingers in toward my chest... I thought about Calum

Why did he break up with me? Did I do something wrong? Was he with someone else or moping?

I remained awake the entire night, though near midnight I was pulled to Zayn, his arms wrapping tightly around me as his lips hit my neck

Soft and warm breaths tingled my skin, making my neck hairs stand on end.

I was trapped against Zayn, his hand grabbed my stomach and a million thoughts went through my head, though they crashed on one

Josh.

If Josh saw this he'd be furious with me. He wouldn't even care about Zayn but he'd definitely care about me being in his boyfriend's bed

I liked Zayn... I knew I did.

But I loved Calum still, and, I knew I'd never have the guts to take advantage of my dating Major

His chest was warm, as were his legs and arms.

His biceps were like thick roots... I felt like the dirt being bonded.

I was comfy as hell, I'd always loved sleeping like this with Calum because it gave me a chance to get closer

But this wasn't the time to decide that I was over Calum when it was obvious even to me.

Calum was always in my head and instead of comparing Zayn to him, I compared him to Zayn.

I always came up with reasons why Calum was better, one of the reasons being he was my boyfriend at one point, I was in love with him... He usually treated me like a prince.

Zayn was a little more attractive but he was a Major who had me here as a punishment. He'd hit me so many times in three weeks, he had horrid mood swings and he could be really scary or he could be really sweet.

The problem was, I knew I would never stop comparing Zayn to Calum. I'd always think about Calum and a part of me would always love him, even if it's not that big a part

"Niall?" I heard Zayn whisper

I closed my eyes and he sat up, saying my name again

I stayed still, feeling his arms slip from my body

The black behind my eyelids turned orange when I heard a lamp turn on.

I felt the covers come down my body and I was rolled toward Zayn.

I pretended to stir and I buried my face sideways into the pillow and Zayn's chest

Zayn shuffled back and I felt the covers leave even my toes uncovered.

His hand went down my calf and I held my breath... What is he doing?

// is anyone watching american horror story tonight? it's literally the only thing i've been looking forward to all week lmao 

xxmolly //

written by; @ZIALLISLIFEE