How to be a good lad [ ziall ] { on hold }

t w e n t y e i g h t

"If you're going to do drugs... At least do them somewhere you can't be caught"

I nodded and Zayn reached into his pocket, pulling out a packet of cigarettes.

He placed a single cigarette between his lips and offered me one, though I wasn't sure if it was a test or not

"Take one" he encouraged

I shook my head and he shrugged, throwing the pack onto the table with his lighter as he sucked in the smoke so his cheeks caved in.

He exhaled by placing his bottom lip a little in front his upper, smoke came spilling out of his mouth like fire, lingering in the air for a few seconds as it still came thinly from the head of his fag.

He offered it again only for me to decline it again.

He took a third puff, and then leant in pulling down my lower lip.

My lips parted and thinking he was going to past me, I opened my mouth, the warm smoke began spilling into my mouth with his breath, I coughed, blinking back tears as he smiled

"Not so good with smoke, are you?" Zayn whispered

He smelt strongly of the cigarette, but I didn't care.

He had another go at exchanging cigarette smoke between us and I coughed it out again

"Breathe it in... Let it linger..." He exhaled smoke into my face "then slowly blow it out"

After another turn, I got the smoke in.
I'd never actually smoked a cigarette before. I'd done drugs all the time, but snorting was always preferred by me along with eating.

But, I swallowed a little too much and ended up coughing, an amused chuckle came from Zayn

"I might not be angry with you" he said "but I can't exactly let you off without a warning"

"Please don't hit me"

"I won't" he answered "but... I want you to let me-"

He was interrupted by a knock on the door

He put out his cigarette and opened up a window, then got the door.

The strong smoke had my eyes red and watering and when I saw Major Devine at the door, I whimpered

"What's going on in here?" He asked "I smell cigarettes"

"I caught him with some stuff as well as his buddies so... I'm just sorting him out"

"Alright, night"

"Night"

He shut the door and locked it again, huffing as he lit a new cigarette

I forgot... He had a boyfriend

"I should go" I said quietly

"Nonsense" Zayn answered, "stay here for the moment"

"I appreciate the offer but-"

He leant in to kiss me again and I squeaked, forcing him back

"Stop it!" I yelled annoyed

"What's the matter?" Zayn asked worriedly

"You're with Josh, for the love of god" I whispered "you can't just kiss me..."

"Forget about Josh"

"You were the one who asked him out in the first place" I said frustrated

"So what?" He asked "It's not like I'm fucking you, its fine"

"Zayn-"

He cut me off with his lips again, this time I made my final decision

"I said no!" I raised my voice "are you deaf?"

I didn't look at him again. I shoved him hard, by slamming both my palms against his chest.

For the first time ever, I actually did a little damage and infuriated, I stormed out his room after yelling profanities at him about how disgusting he behaved and how he was no fucking better than I was

I never got to fear for our next encounter because my anger had caused such a rush that I almost felt high again

I wonder how he reacted though... Did I hurt him? Is he angry? Is he upset?

I hope not. I hope he just tries again because although I hate the idea of him... I don't hate him.

I am seriously all over the place with my emotions towards him.

// im in 8th period rt if u cri

xxmolly //

written by; @ZIALLISLIFEE