why / ON HOLD

Dreams or not

so ive beeen gone for a very long time but i want to dedicate this to @FLOWCHILD for voting and commenting on my book which has inspired me to start writting and now that i can actually use both of my hands to write im back at it and when i was going through my chapters i noticed how many typos there were and im so sry about that i will be trying to edit as much of those out as i can

anyways back to the story......

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i was walking to the next bus stop when i heard the noise. it was terrifying like a bus screech or like my cousin singing in the shower but worse if possible.then i saw it it was a girl but she looked oddly familiar. wait i know her .....but it cant be ...because that looks like.....me

as i loked up into the driver seat i noticed that there were other people in the car it was a large van my brother and friend were in the care with my parents and some other family members i hold dearly to me but in the drivers seat it was also me but how is that possible

the net that happened was the ambulance came but they were late too late as soon as i was gone one by one they started leaving to and the ones that didn't leave were the ones who looked so sickly so sad and...just overall .....depressed

                                                              i was paralyzed

gasping i shot out of bed really sweaty

"it was just a dream oh my god" i started crying silently i was starting to have a panic attack i haven't had a dream like that in a while the last was the night before i killed myself this always happens when i become triggered and cant stop worrying about what would happen to my family if i were to leave or if something were to happen to me by my own accord

but this time the dream was really different the people there were more and kacey was there and so was Tommy and instead of them all turning away they cried and they seemed sad until they deteriorated or almost completely did it was a scary sight it was almost as if they couldn't hand me going like they couldn't handle the pain of seeing me gone

beep beep

so much for going right back to sleep i really wish i could break the alarm clock but i have to get today is the day i start packing to get out of this place because ive been here for a while i have a lot of stuff and i want it done by today so i don't have to worry for the next two days i can just focus on me kacey was released a few weeks ago and she struggled but it went pretty well shes visited me twice and that was very helpful but after i get out i wont see her for about two weeks to get used to being partially alone and then we will be together for as much as we want

but that group chat has been blowing up i mean how many kermit the frog memes do you need like yeah the first few times were funny but now it as stupid as sayin no kemakuh and thats on what jp jp

jeeze i still cant believe i havnt gotten over the habit of talking to myself its not like im in a book or anything i mean only wattpad characters and my maker do that at least i don't have conversation like full conversations in front of the mirror the first thing im going to do is get Starbucks dutch and probably some baconater fries and a frosty .....yep definitely what im going to do

*ding ding*

jeez that's like the hundredth text like who is u this early its like 11 pm

great more Kermit the frog memes

ME: yall are so ducking annoying".....yes i meant ducking

DICKHEAD:  ahhh ali you just miss us

ME :u wish tho

ME: anyways when im out whos up for dutch Starbucks and maybe some baconater fries????

DICKHEAD: DUH

KACEY: i am

PERSON: i am

HERMAN: yessss sirrr lezz go boissss

MY CRUSH: idk if i can go my sis has sum will let you know tho

ME:alright then when i know what time i get out ill let you know we can me at the one on 7th ave if thats chill wit yall

sooooooo it been forever since ive updated its finally up i was drinking Starbucks while writing this and i was honestly not expecting this chapter to turn out like this like i just started writing not knowing what it was going to be about but i hope this was good..... sry i didnt format the texts i couldnt remember who was in the group chat when i go back to edit ill format better but i think yall can probs guess who is who tho