[1.1] Douchebag & Classy | ✓

0.08

Douchebag:

I've never tried eggs. 3:15pm

Classy is typing...

Classy:

What? 3:20pm

Douchebag:

I have never tried eggs. I feel so ashamed. 3:22pm

Classy:

How have you not tried eggs?! 3:24pm

Douchebag:

If I try eggs then they will expect some sort of commitment. I am not ready for that commitment. With chocolate, we have this understanding but I feel eggs would want something more. 3:30pm

Classy:

Eggs are just eggs. Not a relationship? 3:32pm

Douchebag:

BUT EGGS ARE CHICKS! AND CHICKS ARE ASSOCIATED WITH GIRLS. I AM NOT READY TO LET GO OF MY PLAYER WAYS. 3:35pm

Classy:

Wow an egg is an egg not a marriage proposal. 3:42pm

Douchebag:

You don't know that, I could be eating eggs today but tomorrow I could be a married man. 3:48pm

Classy:

To an egg. A man married to an egg. 3:52pm

Douchebag:

I am not ready for that kind of commitment. Let me be young! 3:59pm

Classy is typing...

Classy:

If you married an egg, people would start calling you egg man. 4:02pm

Classy:

By people, I mean myself. 4:02pm

Douchebag is typing...

Douchebag:

You don't understand my pain, when I eat chocolate there is no commitment. Just eat chocolate and leave but with eggs, that is a whole new story. Eggs want that commitment. 4:10pm

Classy:

Is it because it is Friday? Or did Taylor Swift write a song about eggs? Is this why you are crazy? 4:13pm

Douchebag:

DON'T YOU DARE BE DISRESPECTING TAY TAY SHE IS MY BAE BAE. 4:17pm

Classy:

Only asked if she sang a song about eggs. Gosh. 4:20pm

Douchebag:

I will mash you up (」゜ロ゜)」4:25pm

Classy:

Sorry, I don't hit little kids. 4:26pm

Douchebag:

I am not a little kid! 4:27pm

Classy is typing...

Classy:

You sure act like one. Grow up! 4:30pm

Classy:

Or egg up. 4:30pm

Classy:

Laughing at my own joke. 4:30pm

Douchebag is typing...

Douchebag:

I can do this. Eggs here I come. 4:32pm

Classy:

You are such a loser. 4:38pm

One hour later

Douchebag:

I burnt the eggs five times. 5:38pm

Classy:

How is that even possible? 5:45pm

Douchebag:

I make the impossible, possible. That is how cool I am. 5:48pm

Classy:

Lame* Don't you mean lame? 5:52pm

Douchebag:

Anyway, on my sixth try. I had a taste. 5:58pm

Classy:

And? You liked it? 6:01pm

Douchebag:

No, it taste horrible. 6:09pm

Classy:

Damn, Egg man. How will you marry the egg if you don't like it? What will you do Egg man? 6:10pm

Douchebag:

Shut up. It isn't funny. 6:12pm

Classy:

Sure it isn't Egg man. 6:13pm

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